[Type 4] Signs You're a Type 4

[Daenera]

- your self esteem has the best freaking defense in the world - every mistake and failure is another step forward in your self-seeking journey, every flaw in your character found is an awesome discovery, other people need to protect their esteem like a fortress, yours is a whore house inviting all the enemies in.

This reminds me of the confrontation youbats have with Mr.Freeze in Batman:Arkham City( it's not a big spoiler if you haven't played it) :when you attack him in a certain way, using certain method he learns and triggers an effect to prevent that attack from happening a second time, so you can never attack him in the same manner again. Yeah, maybe not the best analogy but I think its close enough
Anyway you managed to describe it so well, I almost feel like starting a confrontation with someone lol I'm all like:
Hey, by that reasoning maybe if 4s start one confrontation every day our self-confidence will be off the charts
Yeah, I feel I may have stumbled upon something

 

[HBIC]

You know you're a type 4 when:

- You find beauty in the most unusual things.
- Learning is a beautiful emotional experience for you. It's not just absorbing knowledge; it's a wondrous experience where knowledge brings light to everything around you.
- You've always felt different from everyone else.
- Your clothing style may change depending on your mood.
- You're on the constant pursuit to figure out just who you really are, and where you belong in the world.
- You consider your tastes in art, music, literature, as well as your favorite topics of study, as a part of your identity... I am ______.
- There's not enough ways to pour out your creative energy.
....

Feel free to add to the list.

- You feel slightly disappointed when someone else feels/does something that you thought only you felt/did.
- You feel suffocated when you're restricted from expressing your individuality.
- You thrive on self-expression.
- You fear finding out that you're a sham who's just the same as everyone else, that you're not truly "unique".
- You secretly hope people will notice that you're different.
- You take pride in your ability to be honest with yourself and your flaws.
- You are familiar/comfortable with your "dark side" and willingly embrace it, thorns and all, in the hopes of discovering some deeper truth about yourself.
- You would rather hold back than say something obvious or cliche.

- you don't care about impressing others, but you want to express yourself
- others have called you self absorbed and dramatic
- you hate doing all the fruitless, ungalamorous labor that most people seem to spend 60% of their life doing
- you have an almost complete inability to do something you're not interested in
- you are disgusted when someone asks you to "fit in"
- when wearing any kind of uniform for school, work or any kind of activity, you find subtle ways to distinguish yourself by messing with it to make it look better
- you either dress with complete apathy or do a 180 and look like your own version of a glamorous celebrity
- you are disgusted by anyone who is fake, emotionally dishonest or people pleasing
- you really don't care about other people at all except on an ethical level, with the exception of a few close friends
- you frequently fight the urge to talk about yourself and encourage others to talk about themselves more

- You feel weird about people having to be subservient to you, and would rather do something on your own. (Applicable for 4w5 sp's)
- Even though you may border a type 5 trait of being a total nerd, and may seem like an intellectual b*tch, deep down you feel emotions strongly.
- You feel anger like blackness and darkness, sadness like a torrential rainstorm, happiness like a glowing heaven.
- Often times you've felt the world has gotten you beaten, but then some creative idea comes up inside your mind, and this creative vision is what keeps you alive, and you're brought back up from the ground.
- Something from the past haunts you, it's like a ghost never quite leaves your presence, and it makes you feel like an empty vessel, yearning to be filled.
- For you, art and music aren't just background wallpapering, or something to keep you entertained, it's something that touches your soul, something that keeps you alive, a part of your being.
- You've been told by your peers that you're focused, independent, and don't let anyone stand in your way to achieving what you want.

- and then at some point your worst fear is confirmed and you actually are like everyone else, but it's not terrible like you thought and it actually frees you up to express yourself more fully because the pressure to be artificially markedly different for the fear that without your difference you'd be nothing is erased. You embrace the fact that you don't have to be different to have human value and that you were born with it. It was your birthright as it is everyone elses' and that we are by nature varied and that what is called personality is a whole you've built all along in the search for it constructed from a stream of actions, attitudes you've adopted and life decisions and you end up with a unique painting but there is no judge who will hand you a prize for it or rate it in any way. The beauty was in the joy and passion of the moment of painting it and it was shared then and there with the people who surrounded you at those moments. There is great beauty and uniqueness and tragedy and joy in each painting and it's ok.

- You do things, play out scenarios, use music, use whatever, to amplify certain feelings.
- You hold on to grudges/old wounds, nursing it and not letting go, feeling that somehow "they" are the ones responsible for depriving you of your dreams.
- Contrary to popular belief, you actually do care for the opinions of others, to an extent, but only if their opinion is that of someone you respect, someone you feel possessing "good tastes." This is the elitist/aristocratic aspect of E4s.

On a side note, how do guys feel about the integration/disintegration theories? For example E4 integrates to 1 when healthy, but disintegrates to 2 when unhealthy, easy right? But what about the wings? For example, if you are a 4w3, is it possible, when unhealthy, to exhibit tendencies of 4 disintegrating to 2 AND 3 disintegrating to 9? Similar with 4w5, disintegrating to both 2 and 7. I ask because I exhibit both the 2 clinginess and 9 apathy/slothiness when I was unhealthy and vice versa (integration to E1 and E6) when healthy. Can anyone relate to any of this?

ME, ME, ME, ME and ME.

JESUS, had I found this thread before I wouldn't have stayed mistyped for so long .

 

[Noll]

- You're terrible at life.

 

[LadyLazarus]

You're internally an emo piece of shit who's blog consists of nothing but whining. Also, when dumb fake as hell fucks with "OMGZ I'M SUCH A BAD ASS" syndrome, or any of it's many other forms, make you want to resurrect Napoleon Bonaparte so he can kill them for you(because you are NOT going to risk infection by doing so yourself and you probably couldn't since you are a small, wimpy, wimpy girl.) just so you can defile their graves afterwards.

That stuff's probably all just me though.

 

[Firebird 8118]

Hmm... interesting thread.
If only I had understood all of these things earlier, maybe I would've been a better companion that my ex deserves.

 

[Nara]

Which then leads to the question: where do the 4s in France fantasize about living?

Guess what, your wish is granted two years later

I've fallen for Italy (all parts of this country is a delight, art and sense of beauty everywhere), New York, Amsterdam, everywhere you can express your uniqueness without being judged. Sorry to disappoint you but France isn't an ideal place for that (and for many other things).

Don't know if it's a charasteric of the 4s, but discovering new places in this world is like exploring new parts of yourself. It's an inner quest.
IMO we never truly feel like we belong anywhere, no matter where we are, but at the same time it can be really exciting or, at least, secretly enjoyable to always feel like an alien on earth.

 

[Nymphie]

You're hesitant to share your favorite music with someone because to you music is a very personal thing, a true form of inner expression.

 

[Nara]

When you once could relate to the obsession of Gabriel Ardalianovitch (oups I just found that his english name is Gavril Ardalionovich) from "The Idiot".

Our friend, Ganya, belonged to the other class—to the "much cleverer" persons, though he was from head to foot permeated and saturated with the longing to be original. This class, as I have said above, is far less happy. For the "clever commonplace" person, though he may possibly imagine himself a man of genius and originality, none the less has within his heart the deathless worm of suspicion and doubt; and this doubt sometimes brings a clever man to despair. (As a rule, however, nothing tragic happens;—his liver becomes a little damaged in the course of time, nothing more serious. Such men do not give up their aspirations after originality without a severe struggle,—and there have been men who, though good fellows in themselves, and even benefactors to humanity, have sunk to the level of base criminals for the sake of originality.

(Sorry I haven't found the passage in its entirety)

When you loved this novel.
...
Or maybe when you just love Dostoesvky.
...
And when, deep down, you know everything else is literature for plebeians.

(kidding... a bit)

 

[LadyRain]

- You feel weird about people having to be subservient to you, and would rather do something on your own. (Applicable for 4w5 sp's)
- Even though you may border a type 5 trait of being a total nerd, and may seem like an intellectual b*tch, deep down you feel emotions strongly.
- You feel anger like blackness and darkness, sadness like a torrential rainstorm, happiness like a glowing heaven.
- Often times you've felt the world has gotten you beaten, but then some creative idea comes up inside your mind, and this creative vision is what keeps you alive, and you're brought back up from the ground.
- Something from the past haunts you, it's like a ghost never quite leaves your presence, and it makes you feel like an empty vessel, yearning to be filled.
- For you, art and music aren't just background wallpapering, or something to keep you entertained, it's something that touches your soul, something that keeps you alive, a part of your being.
- You've been told by your peers that you're focused, independent, and don't let anyone stand in your way to achieving what you want.

I've been wrestling with type 6w5, type 5w4, and type 4w5 when trying to type myself but, your description here is making me lean towards 4w5 I'm a bit confused.

 

[LadyRain]

"... other people need to protect their esteem like a fortress, yours is a whore house inviting all the enemies in.
- sharing your unique thoughts is sort of like a dog taking an intellectual dump, you just need to get it out, it rarely matters how important is the place, as long as you know your leaving it where others can smell it and its all the better if it's where you've sensed the unique smell of others, preferably of the opposite sex (perhaps more so for the Extroverted SX/SO 4s)."

LMFAO

 

[Chthonic]

You've invented your own brand of bitch and spray it like mace.
You delight in how your difference irritates others and amp it up around people you dislike.
You overpower others, not with assertiveness, but with your weirdness and refusal to be like 'them'.
You demand that others love or hate you but are never ambivalent about you.
Secretly you identify with mythic legends like Morgana & Merlin and develop an elaborate tortured love tale to explain your reincarnation over the eons.

 

[Nara]

" I think, therefore I am is the statement of an intellectual who underrates toothaches. I feel, therefore I am is a truth much more universally valid, and it applies to everything that's alive. My self does not differ substantially from yours in terms of its thought. Many people, few ideas: we all think more or less the same, and we exchange, borrow, steal thoughts from one another. However, when someone steps on my foot, only I feel the pain. The basis of the self is not thought but suffering, which is the most fundamental of all feelings. While it suffers, not even a cat can doubt its unique and uninterchangeable self. In intense suffering the world disappears and each of us is alone with his self. Suffering is the university of egocentrism. "

Milan Kundera, Immortality

 

[Bnova]

intj E4x3 here I've only got one...when you never have been accepted by the broader intj community for how you want to express yourself (been having a hard time at personalitycafe ) basically what i'm saying is , when you above average emotional to be approved by the intj community, when you don't feel you fit in anywhere, when you do rigorous research upon yourself in the name of self-awareness and make threads to try and create a path to finding out who you really are then being ridiculed and called a fake and a spammer for it...fml

 

[Qlip]

When you can't keep up with the cool music, the indie, the punk, the wave, the scene stuff, because when you start diving into it, you end up listening to 80's Mainstream Japanese Electronica, or 1600's Scottish Ballads or The Carpenters. Then nobody continues to ever know what you are talking about.

 

[Kullervo]

You search threads on TypoC for any signs that there might be "another" Type 4 and upon sight, immediately seek to discredit this pretender and threat to your identity.

 

[Qlip]

You search threads on TypoC for any signs that there might be "another" Type 4 and upon sight, immediately seek to discredit this pretender and threat to your identity.

Sounds 6-ey. Hahaha.

 

[small.wonder]

You tend to burst all of the bubbles, and more or less ruin everything, except beauty.

When arrogant people hate you for withholding approval from them-- and somehow label you as arrogant for not worshiping them.

Among others...

 

[Kullervo]

Sounds 6-ey. Hahaha.

Then you have admitted a fault in yourself, but lacked the insight to realise it.

 

[Qlip]

Then you are admitting a fault in yourself.

I was completing the symmetry and was amused by it.

 

[Kullervo]

I was just completing the symmetry and was amused by it.

You have much to learn.