User Tag List

Page 5 of 5 FirstFirst ... 345
Results 41 to 43 of 43

Thread: Type 4s and relationship with parents/family

  1. #41
    Senior Member Array Tiltyred's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    468 sx/sp


    My dad was mostly not there. I'm STILL begging for my mother's attention.

  2. #42
    Lungs & Lips Locked Array Unkindloving's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2009


    I'm fairly distant with most of my extended family, or even the family that just doesn't live close by me. We interact on holidays and sometimes through facebook, but I am terrible at calling and visiting. It's not that I don't love them, but it's being unsure of how to interact. We're an eccentric bunch overall, but it feels like families just showcase to one another. I'm not big on the showcasing to that degree, especially throughout the time of having little to showcase.

    Immediate family is a bit different. I get along well with almost all involved- Mom, Dad, Older brother one, Older brother two. The age difference between myself and the brothers is 9 & 10 years, but I don't believe it was ever an obviously isolating element caused by age gap.
    The parents are polar opposites from each other. They have been separated since I was around 9-10, and they argue within an hour of being near one another. Despite that and their annoyances with each other, they each acknowledge that the other is good-hearted and means well. My Mom has always been the epitome of a Mom. My Dad has more of my abrasive, blunt personality traits.
    When they separated, I chose to live with my Dad to stay in the same area, but I was very bitter towards him. He is an alcoholic, but that was more so when I was wee. He would work frequently, or use up all of his sick/vacation days and go to Atlantic City for a few days at a time. I resented the fact that I didn't have a normal childhood, with normal childhood vacations. I actually remember being spiteful of people who had pictures of their vacations where they swam with dolphins or met disney characters. I hated him for a few years during pre-teen times, even though he did try very hard.
    Somehow we got used to one another. It probably helped that my 'I'M A GIRL AND I HAS SO MUCH ANGST' phase subsided
    My Mom.. she was, again, a Mom. I felt there was a lot less freedom with her, but she understood my complaints about my Dad. She was very disorganized, frazzled, and worked 2 jobs for the majority of my younger years. We always got along and would take rides to the beach to watch the sunset though. She also tried. She's always been on my case about how it's unhealthy for my to live with an alcoholic though.

    Sure, there's always been some element of dysfunction, but it really never struck a chord with me except for that weird 'I want to go see Cats on broadway. Baaaw' bitterness. I was given a lot of leeway and freedom to just be and figure myself out, as well as to nourish my social life. It was also a really good foundation for my relationship with my parents. Had they stayed together, or things been any degree of different, I don't think I'd get along with either of them in the slightest.
    Hang on traveling woman - Don't sacrifice your plan
    Cause it will come back to you - Before you lose it on the man

    .:: DWTWD ::.

    2011 TypeC Exercise Challenge - My Weekly Goals: Cardio 4x. Yoga/Pilates 1x. Pushups 70.

    There is this thing keeping everyone's lungs and lips locked - It is called fear and it's seeing a great renaissance

  3. #43
    Senior Member Array Synapse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007


    As a child and an adult I had to deal with neglect, abandonment, lack of affection, passive aggression, manipulation, emotional blackmail, verbal abuse, emotional abuse and control as a normal way of life and general toxicity and environmental stress from my dad, brother and mom. I didn't know anyone else, my extended family live in Europe, grandparents passed away and stuff.

    Do I get along with them yes and no, I am a negotiator, a mediator and a healer. The answer is I am guarded around them, most with my dad and brother and get on well with my mom. Its lonely being aware of their stories and wanting to become visible now away from them.

Similar Threads

  1. On art appreciation: How different personality types behave and interact with art?
    By curiousel in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 34
    Last Post: 11-09-2011, 05:30 AM
  2. [E4] Type 4s and skepticism
    By CuriousFeeling in forum Enneatypes
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 10-22-2010, 04:34 AM
  3. Type Nines and "merging" with loved ones...
    By BlackCat in forum Enneagram
    Replies: 22
    Last Post: 05-09-2010, 04:49 AM
  4. Type Me (New and Improved With Marmite Flavour!)
    By Tigerlily in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 240
    Last Post: 07-25-2008, 12:46 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts