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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    FWIW I feel a resonance with you that I generally experience with other 9's.
    Thanks

    Quote Originally Posted by PeaceBaby View Post
    Same with wolfy, Edahn and some other INTP 9's here. And this was before I knew they were 9's.
    Congrats wolfy! Upgraded to INTP from ISFP!

  2. #32
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    How do you think 9s should attack their avoidance problem with other people?
    Do you avoid people? Or do you just avoid unpleasantness?

    R&H advice is to accept suffering as a tool for becoming self-aware, rather than sublimating/repressing it/avoiding it.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  3. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    Do you avoid people? Or do you just avoid unpleasantness?
    The latter.

    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    R&H advice is to accept suffering as a tool for becoming self-aware, rather than sublimating/repressing it/avoiding it.
    How?

  4. #34
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    How?
    How do you accept suffering?
    Not numbing yourself with alcohol and other "self-medication" is a good start.
    What do you tend to use to escape (suffering)?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    How do you accept suffering?
    Not numbing yourself with alcohol and other "self-medication" is a good start.
    What do you tend to use to escape (suffering)?
    Avoidance.

  6. #36
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Avoidance.
    You forgot the asterisks.
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  7. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Morgan Le Fay View Post
    You forgot the asterisks.
    I avoided them.



    Let's use an example:

    Say you have a religious mother but you're an atheist. She expects you to attend church. If you tell you her you don't and that you don't believe in God, you will trigger a crying guilt trip that will last for hours, and the subject will come up again and again. Why not simply avoid the subject then? Or - if you don't avoid it, what is the point of not avoiding it? You'll hurt your mother, why hurt her?

  8. #38
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    Let's use an example:

    Say you have a religious mother but you're an atheist. She expects you to attend church. If you tell you her you don't and that you don't believe in God, you will trigger a crying guilt trip that will last for hours, and the subject will come up again and again. Why not simply avoid the subject then? Or - if you don't avoid it, what is the point of not avoiding it? You'll hurt your mother, why hurt her?
    What is that an example of? Being liberated?
    I'm missing your point somewhere...
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  9. #39
    Reason vs Being ragashree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MacGuffin View Post
    I avoided them.

    Let's use an example:

    Say you have a religious mother but you're an atheist. She expects you to attend church. If you tell you her you don't and that you don't believe in God, you will trigger a crying guilt trip that will last for hours, and the subject will come up again and again. Why not simply avoid the subject then? Or - if you don't avoid it, what is the point of not avoiding it? You'll hurt your mother, why hurt her?
    Further proof that I'm not a type 9, if any were needed

    I think my response in such a scenario would have been something along the lines of: "What I believe in really isn't anything to do with you, so why don't you give it a rest and mind your own business instead of mine?"

    I don't see why you'd be so worried about hurting someone who's behaving in a passive-aggressive manner and trying to manipulate, or how this would be (as Morgan seems to be saying) in any way "liberating". All it's likely to achieve, it seems to me, is keeping them on your back by using the same tactics because they're achieving their purpose, whereas what you actually want is them off your back with the obnoxious controlling behaviour. If you don't express yourself assertively and show you mean business in that kind of situation, their expectations will remain unchallenged, and you don't give yourself much option for dealing with the situation except being passive-aggressively avoidant yourself (ie by making up excuses for not going, disappearing at the vital moment, or "forgetting" about it). To me backing yourself into a corner where you can't express yourself directly isn't in any way liberating, it seems more confining. Just my take on it though
    Look into my avatar. Look deep into my avatar...

  10. #40
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    NT type 9's have always been a bit weird to me. Since I definitely feel a resonance with them but then there is the fact that we think so much differently.
    () 9w8-3w4-7w6 tritype.

    sCueI (primary Inquisition)

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