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[Type 9] The soul child of Type Nine - Point Three

Gerbah

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(This is not verbatim what is in the book but is the general gist, sometimes paraphrased or rephrased by me to make clearer what might otherwise not be understandable outside of reading it within the context of the whole book, plus a brief summing up at the end.)

The soul child of Type Nine is Point Three on the Enneagram. Its �passion� (or vice) is lying. It can appear in a tendency to deceive and lie in order to present to another what will get approval. Like a child who takes a cookie when mother told her not to or pretends to be sick to skip school a Nine's soul child pleads that s/he did not do it and s/he really does have an upset stomach.

Within every Nine is a young place that wants to be seen, to shine, to be the centre of attention. So there is a little show-off, wanting to do her dance and be applauded.

Behind the self-abnegating tendency lies a drivenness and often a ruthlessness about succeeding � usually well hidden and pushed out of consciousness. The shadow of this can be seen falling across the consciousness in the fear of the Nine to appear too pushy or take up too much space.

Underneath the inertia of the Nine is their soul child's focus on doing, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and unable to stop.

As Nines allow themselves to get in touch with the psychodynamic structure in them that consists of their soul child's qualities, they will progressively experience themselves as more complex. Exhibitionist tendencies will transform into a sincere recognition of their personhood. They will see that being a person in their own right was not supported during their childhood, and so they became accommodating and self-absenting in order to get approval.

If they reclaim themselves as valuable and lovable, they will start to be able to experience the aspect of Essence that Almaas calls the �Pearl Beyond Price� � it is radiant and luminous and independent of any constraints of the conditioning they have experienced in their lives.

They will become free of any self-image or mental construct defining who they are and will be able to contact and interact in the world liberated from the sleep of personality.

So Nines, contrary to what they might think or feel, are unconditionally lovable just as they are, as they were when they came into this world. They have no need to be something else or any image they imagine. When they fulfil the needs of their soul child, they will naturally let the light they were given shine for everyone to see.
 
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BlackCat

Shaman
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If they reclaim themselves as valuable and lovable, they will start to be able to experience the aspect of Essence that Almaas calls the “Pearl Beyond Price” – it is radiant and luminous and independent of any constraints of the conditioning they have experienced in their lives.

They will become free of any self-image or mental construct defining who they are and will be able to contact and interact in the world liberated from the sleep of personality.

SO true.
 

PeaceBaby

reborn
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This is why the enneagram speaks more, so much more to me about personal growth and behavioural dynamics than the MBTI ever can.

Within every Nine is a young place that wants to be seen, to shine, to be the centre of attention. So there is a little show-off, wanting to do her dance and be applauded.

Yep :yes:

Behind the self-abnegating tendency lies a drivenness and often a ruthlessness about succeeding – usually well hidden and pushed out of consciousness.

I wouldn't say mine is so hidden.:) It was the way I got attention during my formative years, succeeding. So I (to this day) strive to that excellence that exceeds average expectations. By the time I was 20, I believed there was nothing I couldn't do if I set my mind to it.

BUT:

Underneath the inertia of the Nine is their soul child's focus on doing, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and unable to stop.

It's a matter of not being able to stop until I succeed. How can I if I haven't mastered or excelled? I work now to recognize when things are best let go. When 80% is "good enough" - when success doesn't necessarily mean I am up on some podium getting an award for what I have accomplished.

And it's OK not to "like" everything, or want to do it just because I think I should. A recent example: there was a choral group starting up nearby and I went to the first rehearsal. I didn't really like the music, so I decided right then and there, not to go again. In the past (10 years ago perhaps) I would have said, give it a chance, maybe you will like it better, like the people better, you don't want to disappoint these people blah blah blah. Now, I strive to let my first impressions have a say in the matter too.

They will see that being a person in their own right was not supported during their childhood, and so they became accommodating and self-absenting in order to get approval.

:yes: so true. "If I want your opinion, I'll give it to you."

So Nines, contrary to what they might think or feel, are unconditionally lovable just as they are, as they were when they came into this world. They have no need to be something else or any image they imagine. When they fulfil the needs of their soul child, they will naturally let the light they were given shine for everyone to see.

I still have trouble believing that (@bold.) If I took some of the filters off, I do wonder if anyone would truly accept me as I am. There's only a tiny handful of people who I think care about me as I am.

Although in a great irony, the closest relationships I have have been formed when I am the least concerned with what the world thinks of me for taking action.

I am intrigued by this book; I am going to look it up and explore it.

Thanks Gerbah for posting this. :)
 
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Gerbah

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This is why the enneagram speaks more, so much more to me about personal growth and behavioural dynamics than the MBTI ever can.

I agree. I think Enneagram describes who you are on a much deeper level than MBTI. It's useful to know your cognitive functions and all that, but how I function and the cognitive skills I'm better at using are not necessarily who I am. I also find MBTI is more boxy than Enneagram. The divisions between types are harder whereas with the Enneagram, they are more fluid, the types are less divided and the whole thing is more holistic, which makes sense when you take it to a spiritual level beyond the personality and there is no division between anything.

I still have trouble believing that (@bold.) If I took some of the filters off, I do wonder if anyone would truly accept me as I am. There's only a tiny handful of people who I think care about me as I am.

Although in a great irony, the closest relationships I have have been formed when I am the least concerned with what the world thinks of me for taking action.

In spiritual Enneagram, this is more about who you are on an existential level, between just you and yourself and your first origin from where you came, not about if other people love you or not as you are. Even if nobody did, if you are in touch with yourself in this way, you might feel sadness on the ego level, but below that nothing could touch your peace.

I am intrigued by this book; I am going to look it up and explore it.

:yes:
 

phoenity

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Wow, this hits home hard.

Some of these things have been coming to the surface recently, although subtlety, but this makes it so much clearer.


I've recently become much more interested in Enneagram. I realize now that understanding why I do things, subconscious motivations, are much more useful to me in self-development than thinking about my preference for how I do things, which is easily explained by MBTI.

I've always known how I do things. I'm looking for the why.
 

ilovereeses

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Underneath the inertia of the Nine is their soul child's focus on doing, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and unable to stop.

Not so much the case for me. I'm usually scared of losing the inspiration half way through. And I usually do, unless it's video editing. I will stay up all night finishing a video, and I don't really mind it.

I agree 100% with everything else though!
 
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StephMC

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I'm still learning about the Enneagram theory, and believe I'm a 9w8... but I'm not sure I relate to everything said about 9s quite yet...

Underneath the inertia of the Nine is their soul child's focus on doing, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and unable to stop.

...But this is so incredibly spot on, it's scary. :shock: I've never really been able to put this part about me into the right words.

I used to work in a computer lab on campus when I was still in school. My job responsibilities included pretty much nothing. I would sit at the desk for hours twiddling my thumbs waiting for the motivation to study. My boss would try to talk me into playing a video game with him and I'd refuse...telling him if I played games then I would -DEFINITELY- not study. He would just look at me like I was crazy and say it was still better than doing nothing, right? I would still just sit there. :mellow:

I've always deprived myself of a lot of things/activities in fear that it would keep me from my obligations.
 

hilo

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Wow, this hits home hard.

Some of these things have been coming to the surface recently, although subtlety, but this makes it so much clearer.


I've recently become much more interested in Enneagram. I realize now that understanding why I do things, subconscious motivations, are much more useful to me in self-development than thinking about my preference for how I do things, which is easily explained by MBTI.

I've always known how I do things. I'm looking for the why.

Agree. I definitely rolled my eyes and said "yeah whatever, this isn't real" when I first read enneagram (I did NOT like being typed as a nine).

Now I feel like MBTI is limiting my understanding of a lot of interactions, because I try to squeeze everything into the preference framework.

I have always been vaguely aware of a lot of strange "dichotomies" in my nature, and this description is exactly right. My inner instinct is definitely one that wants to be admired, but I squash that feeling down as soon as I can - I hate the thought of being like that!

And I have, countless times, told myself I will stop telling white lies to make people happy. I never thought that feeling would be so well explained by enneagram.
 

Moiety

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Just found this thread. Wow, is all I have to say.

Underneath the inertia of the Nine is their soul child's focus on doing, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and unable to stop.

This is really true for me. It feels weird saying this, and I sometimes allow people to see me as cocky in a joking way (because at the same time they seem me as a bit of a slacker and I make sure to keep a healthy dose of self-deprication) but I think my biggest fear in life is actually my own power (and having a strong 8 wing contributes to that). I'm afraid if I set my mind to something I will definitely get everything I want. And also afraid of my power over other people.

Lol this all sounds a bit too esoteric sometimes but I've stopped questioning the validity of the enneagram sometime ago. And Ni.

As for being lovable I think as an ENFP 9, it's a bit easier to see how people really feel about me.
 

Rambling

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This is why the enneagram speaks more, so much more to me about personal growth and behavioural dynamics than the MBTI ever can.

I still have trouble believing that (@bold.) If I took some of the filters off, I do wonder if anyone would truly accept me as I am. There's only a tiny handful of people who I think care about me as I am.

Although in a great irony, the closest relationships I have have been formed when I am the least concerned with what the world thinks of me for taking action.

I am intrigued by this book; I am going to look it up and explore it.

I read the book recently and it's really excellent.

Taking off the filters and not being afraid of showing who I am, that's a big step for me, but I'm working on it. And yet what you say is so true, that the authenticity of that has its own results...

I'm sure people do care about me as I am; I suspect they see more of me than they admit to seeing, just as I mustn't myself keep quiet about someone else's faults to save them from feeling criticised or hurt...
 

Lady Lazarus

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Within every Nine is a young place that wants to be seen, to shine, to be the centre of attention. So there is a little show-off, wanting to do her dance and be applauded.

Behind the self-abnegating tendency lies a drivenness and often a ruthlessness about succeeding � usually well hidden and pushed out of consciousness. The shadow of this can be seen falling across the consciousness in the fear of the Nine to appear too pushy or take up too much space.

Underneath the inertia of the Nine is their soul child's focus on doing, and often Nines are afraid that if they start an activity, they will become driven and unable to stop.

As Nines allow themselves to get in touch with the psychodynamic structure in them that consists of their soul child's qualities, they will progressively experience themselves as more complex. Exhibitionist tendencies will transform into a sincere recognition of their personhood.

I never see most of this in the broadstrokes and it is a shame. Thought I assume that has everything to do with source and source focus then subsequently, their frequency.
 

misfortuneteller

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I find the word 'soul child' cheesy but I agree with this theory. I do secretly want to be noticed and I keep hoping for a day when i'd be able to shine.
 
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