[Traditional Enneagram] How to make friends as an enneagram 5?

[Spectre]

Hello

I have been lurking around here for quite a while, but have now taken the step to register.

Anyways, i have the question presented in the title, "How to make friends as an enneagram 5".

I have been trying for a couple of months, with some results.

However i wish to have some concrete advice.

Thanks beforehand,

// Spectre

 

[Tiger Owl]

Be yourself, be respectful, talk with people or interact in a medium of your choosing if talking is not your thing, don't desire or expect everyone you meet will like you. Patience is key.
Welcome to the forum.

 

[Spectre]

Thanks for the welcoming.

My quest for making new friends have been trough the net.

Perhaps I should do it IRL. I imagine it would go better...

 

[Population: 1]

There are a decent variety of sections here. [MENTION=34311]Tiger Owl[/MENTION] ‘s advice is what I would follow. I’m a fairly withdrawn person outside of the forums yet here because of the format (lack of face to face, I am much better at articulating thoughts in writing than verbally, I can interact when I want for as long as I want) I’m a very social person. You’ll figure out the personalities you’ll mesh with and the ones you won’t fairly quickly. Enjoy!

 

[Spectre]

Open-minded seems to be the common denominator when it comes to my friends.
However, I do not know how to find them specifically.
I will have to think something up.

 

[JocktheMotie]

Going in with the goal of making friends is going to cause you to behave a little differently and will ultimately be too high energy to sustain for a long period of time, so you'll get burned out and fail.

Friends are habits in the form of people. You make them by sharing space, either physical or online, and essentially having to interact in a shared activity consistently over a time period. You can somewhat counteract the energy expenditure of being social by undertaking a new activity that's of interest to you within that social space.

It's good if it's scheduled, so you can always count on having energy for it. These can be anything from book clubs, maker spaces, the gym, sports leagues, gaming, etc. They don't have to be in person either; if you're big on gaming, find some good ones to play and join a clan/guild, playing that way.

So essentially, share a digital or physical space with people while doing an interesting activity. Then you'll make friends.

 

[Spectre]

Thank you for the piece of advice. I appreciate it greatly.

I have been going to the gym lately, and I have to admit, it has been out of my comfort zone. Regardless, the exercise has been wonderful.

 

[JocktheMotie]

Thank you for the piece of advice. I appreciate it greatly.

I have been going to the gym lately, and I have to admit, it has been out of my comfort zone. Regardless, the exercise has been wonderful.

If your gym has them for free, classes are a good option. People don't like to be talked to during their personal workouts, but classes lend themselves to that shared experience and can open up opportunities to meet likeminded people.

 

[Spectre]

If your gym has them for free, classes are a good option. People don't like to be talked to during their personal workouts, but classes lend themselves to that shared experience and can open up opportunities to meet likeminded people.

I have attended body balance-classes at the gym.
Haven´t talked especially much to anyone though. It is a quiet group, so to speak.