[Traditional Enneagram] What type did your culture raise you to be?

[Yama]

the one that i am i guess

 

[brightflashes]

I think I was raised to be one of the competency types, so 1, 3, or 5. My family & culture/peers valued academics and capability. The only major exception is that I do believe my dad would have been happy if I were a type 2 as well. It's easier to apply this to MBTI rather than Enneagram, though, as Enneagram is a set of defense mechanisms and patterns of behavior to handle stress while MBTI seems like it is shaped more culturally. If this were on the MBTI forum, it would be easier for me to say that my parents/peers/culture wanted me to be an XNFP.

 

[Forever]

If this forum is an influence.. I would say it exudes at most Fe and e1 tendencies.

Interesting to learn about, but nauseating after a while

 

[Ashtart]

If this forum is an influence.. I would say it exudes at most Fe and e1 tendencies.

Interesting to learn about, but nauseating after a while

How come?

 

[Starry]

Italian-American

Definitely raised to be counterphobic 6 and 7. So I was a good girl and became exactly what I was to become.

 

[Starry]

(Italian middle-class)
My education has been something on the lines of phobic 6 or 1. I ended up having a counterphobic relationship with authority.
My culture is probably something 7-2/3ish-1.

Do you have Mafioso in your background?


***totally just realized that's super personal so scratch it if you wish...just explaining the cp relationship with authority

 

[Starry]

Nope, lol. But its characteristic "family worshipping" is said to be more widespread in the South, while I live in northern Italy. My background is just standard conservative, I believe.
Probably I'm cp just because I have realized that a lot of those ideals don't make sense, while still being a 6.

I'm so sorry I thought you were from the old country...not living in the old country!!! I'm happy to meet you.


My grandfather's side are from Alessandria (I should say there are many still there and there's a big family reunion every year)


I guess we are all a little counterphobic regardless haha!

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

Italian-American

Definitely raised to be counterphobic 6 and 7. So I was a good girl and became exactly what I was to become.

What region does your family come from? Are you Neopolitalan, Sicilian, et al?

I had a roommate with 100% Sicilian background, and his father had buddies who were connected. I sort of suspect his dad was too and I realize that's probably a completely racist assumption

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I'm so sorry I thought you were from the old country...not living in the old country!!! I'm happy to meet you.


My grandfather's side are from Alessandria (I should say there are many still there and there's a big family reunion every year)


I guess we are all a little counterphobic regardless haha!

nevermind my last question

 

[Starry]

What region does your family come from? Are you Neopolitalan, Sicilian, et al?

I had a roommate with 100% Sicilian background, and his father had buddies who were connected. I sort of suspect his dad was too and I realize that's probably a completely racist assumption

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nevermind my last question

One grandmother was Roman...and the other was Neapolitan. And my other grandfather was Milano. No one was from Sicily...but when my Dad's people came over here...they just got their winery....that they poured every last dime in up-and-running when *surprise* Prohibition. There weren't a lot of options for my family at that time...


*whoops...I should say that these were great-grandparents. We didn't make that distinction though in my family.


here's where I think standard issue Italian counterphobia jumped the tracks...during this time.

 

[Frosty]

Probably ISFJ.

I would say esfj but the focus in my family at least is supress feelings and walk on eggshells and please everyone but yourself- never address your own emotions- EVER- go off and deal with them on your own.

Larger culture- EXFX types. Mostly ESFX types.

Enneagram- home- 9, 1, or phobic 6.

Outside world- 2, 6, 9.

I type as 964. The 4 is me grasping at air for SOMETHING to call MINE. Something I developed both because and in spite of society/upbringing.

 

[PumpkinMayCare]

Well, hard to answer that question because my family kind of had its own culture going on...
They valued knowledge a lot. Reading, going to museums and art galleries, lots of sight-seeing, was always told not to be a hanger-on and not follow blindly every trend.

As for the general culture, well, I grew up in a small town, I realized people there liked to have fun at the umpteen town fêtes, so I'd say being an E7 was definitely encouraged. But other than that, uh, I don't know. Probably being an E1 was encouraged as in having a very tidy and cleaned up apartement/house. Just imagine your typical suburbian mentality, haha.

As for girls being raised to be caring and nurturing, eh, it was a thing for the more christian families. But most people were atheists and noone expected you to be a walking stereotype of a future housewive... (still really, really glad about that). However, there was a bit of an expectation for girls to look like a stereotypical female. But there weren't any expectations that'd really impact girls life in the grand scheme of things (like expecting girls to find a husband and get married as soon as possible).

All in all, E7, E3 and E1, I think, were the most encouraged...

 

[Qlip]

I was 'raised' to be feral, what type is that? 6 maybe?

 

[ceecee]

Probably a 5. I am the only girl in my own and extended family so obviously they heaped a lot of female things on me alone. Not that this is a bad thing it itself. It's just not in my nature to do it the way a e2 or e6 might, although I don't think I was raised to be that girl-y. It's hard to explain. But e5 isn't exactly a foreign feeling type either, since 8's and 5's are similar.

 

[Doctor Cringelord]

I said 1w2 earlier but that was more broad, a combination of school and everything else. I think my mom encouraged 9ish and 1ish qualities, while my dad encouraged more 3ish, 5ish and 6ish qualities. He was and still is big on image and impressions, which was something I sort of struggled with, even though the influence still played a part in my development; he also encouraged some skepticism, fear/caution and a sort of tactical/logistical minded approach to situations (even social situations), which is already sort of my natural approach. She encouraged diplomacy and "honest lawyer" qualities (in other words, I think she encouraged advocacy and compassion for the weak and less fortunate) but also told me not to take shit from people, to stand up to bullies and speak up when I saw injustices and I think that was also fairly natural to me, but her influence may have accentuated it. In terms of MBTI, she was very much like an IxFJ or ISFP in her influence, he was more like an ExTP/ExxJ in his influence.

I don't know about how much the southern culture overall influenced me. I'd say not that much, especially considering my parents were carpetbaggers from Jersey and Maryland (technically a Southern state, but I don't think of it as one). I did have some roots in mountain folk and Georgian dirt farmers but I wasn't as close to those branches of the family tree. I wanted to be an explorer, professor, or a pirate as a kid

 

[Virtual ghost]

As said trully plenty of times: I have huge problems with twisting typology that it fits environment in which I was growing up. For example typology fails to notice that an 8 that is born in totalitarian system may be more openminded towards not having perfect control. Since that is not realistic expectation, therefore he is likely to creep around the edges of the society. Since that is the most independant you can get.


So yeah, culture and even more political reality can totally twist the types.

Just for the record: I very often feel as if I should be 1 (or 8 perhaps) and I have even tested as both of those. However I just can't relate to how American culture sees both of those types. Since both of them have alot of cultural bagage on them. From religion to guns and constitution.

I know perfectly who I am but I am not sure how to type what I am. Therefore since I am pretty intellectual I go with e5 since e5 is pretty much a 5 everywhere around the world. Even if I could pass as 1, 8 or 3 that is in "survival mode".

 

[GloriaInExcelsisDeo]

I was raised, if I can call it that, by a foster family, and towards them I've often been driven to feel the resentment of a 1, but they really made their best effort to raise me as a 2 despite the fact that I am a man. The dominant fostermother was a maniacal, manipulative, secular ex-nurse with a fascination for surgery procedures, blood and organs. She was the dominant matriarch and tried to make me a doctor.

I never listened to her though, and stayed a 1 throughout my childhood into my adulthood.

Oh, and I live in Sweden btw. The foster family were ethnic Swedes.

 

[Chad of the OttomanEmpire]

White Suburban American speaking.

I can honestly say I felt the most pressure from overall society to be 3ish (professionally speaking). Everything has to "look good", shine that resume up, "fake it till ya make it", wear the right clothes, look professional, show confidence, etc. Almost with a 7ish cast--be bubbly, upbeat, and outgoing or you're not acceptable. POSITIVE THINKING. Always remember to smile, why are you not smiling? No one wants to hear it, no negativity allowed. Take your meds and get back on the assembly line. I can deal with the first part, but the second part makes me want to start hitting people.

I also feel there's a lot of 6ness in American culture--the sky is always falling. There's always some cataclysmic event coming our way--an overarching terrorist enemy that will wipe us off the map, the end of social security, the national debt, TV is giving kids cancer, Video Games are ruining our youth, climate change means it's the end, etc etc etc. It's like we constantly feel that we're on the brink total annihilation or something. It was a real shift when I began living outside the country and saw that other cultures took these concerns and dealt with them efficiently while maintaining a hopeful outlook on their ability to create a better future. So, I acknowledge that my mind was biased that way as well.

Ftr, as a girl, I felt no pressure to be more 2ish whatsoever.

In my own family...everyone in the immediate family is a sp9 (or 9-fixed), and that's what I was inculcated with there, perhaps more deeply. I'm probably triple reactive, and you can see why I had trouble both living with my family as well as figuring out my core type. They basically did everything in their power to undermine my natural tendencies, suppress my expression, and deny my fire; with the end result that I became a withdrawn, apathetic, disempowered adult that didn't know I was supposed to go out and have fun when I was young. I still bear great antipathy towards them.

 

[hjgbujhghg]

I think that my family's quite 6ish, loyality, hard work, rules, security, safety are the top priorities shared among my closest relatives.
The stereotype of someone from my country is submissive, quiet but helpful and friendy, passive agressive, loyal, conservative, which I think are the values of both 9 and 6.

 

[chubber]

My family is 6 and 7, so that was expected, I'm sure 6w7 and 9w1 was the expected way of life in my direct family, extended family probably more 5 and 2.

I think 2s are drawn towards 5s, maybe that's why?

 

[Morpeko]

I think Asian-Americans are often raised to be 1s and 3s. There has been a huge push for me to be both compliant and competency-focused in my childhood.