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Thread: 1 vs 3

  1. #1
    You are what you love themightyfetus's Avatar
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    Default 1 vs 3

    Both are perfectionistic. Both can be extremely hardworking. I have trouble distinguishing the two. What are the differences?

    I am trying to discover which type I lean more to, in order to find out my Enneagram wing. I feel very self-centered and embarrassed making yet another thread that ultimately comes back to myself, because I feel annoyed with people who are obsessed with type-me threads. Please know that I am not trying to make another of these threads (and I hope I don't come across as that way). I am not asking for your opinions on my type; I am asking for information on the two types so I can decide for myself. Self-discovery is fun. And I do have a strong interest in Enneagram, so all the better. Thanks.

    Here are the 16 statements from the time in my life when I was a self-hating, compulsive perfectionist (I have since overcome it).


    1. "If I'm not perfect, I will not live up to my family name."
    2. "I have an unrealistic vision of an idealized self, and I need to be perfect to achieve it."
    3. "I don't celebrate my achievements. I criticize myself for what I don't achieve."
    4. "I'm tired of blaming myself, but I don't believe in blaming other people. I try to blame my perfectionism, but then I realize it's my fault after all."
    5. "I am ruthless to myself when I fail. I am a bad person if I make a mistake, in any area of life."
    6. "The only way to combat my lazy nature is to work myself to death."
    7. "People were very hurtful to me when I was young, so I work to be perfect in order to prove to them that I have changed."
    8. "If I want to achieve my dreams, I cannot make any mistakes."
    9. "I have built my entire identity on the things I achieve. When I do not do these things perfectly, then I lose myself."
    10. "All love is based on performance. If I perform perfectly, I will get more love than if I had not."
    11. "My perfectionism is rooted in inferiority. I am naturally worse than other people, so I have to be perfect."
    12. "Life is a ladder. Whenever I perform badly, I am knocked down a rung."
    13. "I have to make up for all the years I didn't do well by being perfect."
    14. "I need to prove to myself and the world that I can do well."
    15. "I would rather have a false sense of accomplishment than a very real sense of failure."
    16. "Being kind to myself leads to laziness. I must hate myself in order to do well."

    I'm interested in which statements correlate with each type, because I feel like there are both in there.
    Yet I know, if I stepped aside
    Released the controls, you would open my eyes
    That somehow, all of this mess
    Is just my attempt to know the worth of my life
    .

    Mercury - Sleeping At Last

    3w2 // 6w7 // 9w1

  2. #2
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    It's really more about the motivation behind the perfectionism. 3s want to project an ideal image while 1s want to do things correctly, properly out of a drive to uphold integrity. 3s are more focused on efficiency, pragmatism while 1s are more focused on making sure to do things the proper, right way however they define it. Both strive for competency.

    You scream w1.
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  3. #3
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    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Protege View Post
    It's really more about the motivation behind the perfectionism. 3s want to project an ideal image while 1s want to do things correctly, properly out of a drive to uphold integrity. 3s are more focused on efficiency, pragmatism while 1s are more focused on making sure to do things the proper, right way however they define it. Both strive for competency.
    This is a very good distinction.

    E1: I must be competent to be morally consistent (gut focus)
    E3: I must be competent to be attractive (image focus)
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  4. #4
    I could do things Hard's Avatar
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    One thing to bare in mind (and this is much more so for 1 as a wing), the perfectionism of E1 does not have to be outwardly directed.
    MBTI: ExxJ tetramer
    Functions: Fe > Te > Ni > Se > Si > Ti > Fi > Ne
    Enneagram: 1w2 - 3w4 - 6w5 (The Taskmaster) | sp/so
    Socionics: β-E dimer | -
    Big 5: slOaI
    Temperament: Choleric/Melancholic
    Alignment: Lawful Neutral
    External Perception: Nohari and Johari

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  5. #5
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    1s are much more concrete, direct, principled and emotionally detached than typical 3s.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Virtual ghost View Post
    1s are much more concrete, direct, principled and emotionally detached than typical 3s.
    I would debate the bold. 3w4 is known as "the professional" for a reason. From my perspective, viewing things in terms of principles typically comes off as emotionally charged. It really depends on the wings and the individual.
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  7. #7
    You are what you love themightyfetus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Protege View Post
    I would debate the bold. 3w4 is known as "the professional" for a reason. From my perspective, viewing things in terms of principles is fairly emotionally charged. It really depends on the wings and the individual.
    Did some more research, and I read that 3's detach from their emotions, and 1's suppress it.

    And 3's are more concerned about people *seeing* them succeed...right?
    Yet I know, if I stepped aside
    Released the controls, you would open my eyes
    That somehow, all of this mess
    Is just my attempt to know the worth of my life
    .

    Mercury - Sleeping At Last

    3w2 // 6w7 // 9w1

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by themightyfetus View Post
    Did some more research, and I read that 3's detach from their emotions, and 1's suppress it.

    And 3's are more concerned about people *seeing* them succeed...right?
    yes. Pretty much. 1s to me are anything but "emotionally detached"... they may suppress anger but people around them can still it. 3s, on other hand, may come off more emotionally expressive but they basically conceal/detach from their true emotions... like a mask.
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  9. #9
    Queen hunter Virtual ghost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Protege View Post
    I would debate the bold. 3w4 is known as "the professional" for a reason. From my perspective, viewing things in terms of principles typically comes off as emotionally charged. It really depends on the wings and the individual.

    Ok, that can perhaps be the case. After all I have 1w9 and 3w4 fixes a therefore I am biased when it come to this topic.

  10. #10
    Honeyed Water thoughtlost's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by themightyfetus View Post
    Did some more research, and I read that 3's detach from their emotions, and 1's suppress it.

    And 3's are more concerned about people *seeing* them succeed...right?
    I am not sure about the top part. I know 3s that are pretty emotional. I know a 3, she isn't expressive with her emotions because her emotions are about her worrying about what people think about her. It's not something she wants to show. She looks "put together."

    ...Then of course, there are people like Tyra Banks... a super expressive 3 haha.

    The last part I'd agree with from my experience. Whatever it is they do (it really doesn't matter what they do), they generally want to look good in the eyes of others (AND in their own eyes). I've noticed that my mom will whine about not looking good in front of others; she generally doesn't like being embarrassed/hates feeling shamed. She SAYS she hates bragging ...but she'll brag about things occassionally (not in a bad way) about being a good daughter to her mother, a good student, a good worker or just simply about being a good person.
    You are so arbitrary.

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