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  1. #1
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    Default Enneagram Type 8

    My father is an enneagram type 7w8. At times his wing influence is so strong he could be mistyped as an 8. Ime, with type 8's and those with a strong 8 wing, there is a over-riding sense of Honor in all that they do. They are open, honest and direct in their dealings with people. You always know what is on their minds and where they stand on any given issue. Also, you never wonder where you stand in relation to them. If there is something they don't like they tell you straight air it out and then seek resolution. Since 8's have a line to type 2, they are often generous with their time and energy and have a large circle of freinds (and sometimes have difficulty saying no, especially when it comes to their own children). They aren't known to hide and make petty swipes. They are very much "what you see is what you get". They also generally aren't known to attack or bully (that's the domain of CP6's). They also tend to engage in open dialogue and encourage open discussion because they value truth and honesty. Also, if they sense any kind of underlying issue which needs to be addressed they will bring it out into the open and confront head on. Also, They aren't petty, nit-picky, or critical people.

    Just wanted to share
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  2. #2
    Emperor/Dictator kyuuei's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by violett View Post
    there is a over-riding sense of Honor in all that they do. They are open, honest and direct in their dealings with people. You always know what is on their minds and where they stand on any given issue.
    Honor absolutely. The last sentence is actually a great source of frustration for me as well.. I'm human. There are times I naturally do NOT want to say what's on my mind for any number of reasons.. or I want to say what's on my mind and cannot. Either way, it feels like I'm being pigeon-holed (by my own self or others respectively) and cowardly and everything else even if the situation calls for it.

    I'll take everything you said though. I needed a confidence boost just about now.
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  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by kyuuei View Post
    Honor absolutely. The last sentence is actually a great source of frustration for me as well.. I'm human. There are times I naturally do NOT want to say what's on my mind for any number of reasons.. or I want to say what's on my mind and cannot. Either way, it feels like I'm being pigeon-holed (by my own self or others respectively) and cowardly and everything else even if the situation calls for it.

    I'll take everything you said though. I needed a confidence boost just about now.
    Well, certain things are best kept to yourself especially if you are taking others feelings into consideration or not prepared to deal with the fallout of what is on your mind. I understand your dislike of feeling cowardly have definitely seen it in my father. He feels like he has to reel himself in to avoid stepping on peoples toes. I'm glad reading my thoughts on type 8's gave you a confidence boost. I think because 2's and 8's share a common line on the enneagram there's somewhat of an unspoken recognition, mutual respect, and understanding. At least that's been my experience with my father. I have always been able to turn to him for understanding and support no matter how difficult my life has been. In recent conversation, he mentioned feeling the same way. We have pretty much always had a decent relationship.

    Thank you for replying

  4. #4
    Undisciplined Starry's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by violett View Post
    My father is an enneagram type 7w8. At times his wing influence is so strong he could be mistyped as an 8.
    They also generally aren't known to attack or bully (that's the domain of CP6's).
    They also tend to engage in open dialogue and encourage open discussion because they value truth and honesty. Also, if they sense any kind of underlying issue which needs to be addressed they will bring it out into the open and confront head on. Also, They aren't petty, nit-picky, or critical people.

    I love your post violett. Having read kyuuei's stuff for quite a few years now I know she fits your definition of 8 to a tee. There's another member as well. Since the day she first came here I have been convinced she is an 8 and yet I doubt she has ever even considered my typing due to 8's less than honorable reputation. And so yah...





    My concern though is merely that it be quite clear this is your opinion...your experience correct? That statement about counterphobia concerns me more than anything really. Reading this you would think...if the individual is a total bastard 8 is out of the question or something along those lines and that is just not true. Unhealthy 8s and 6cp can both be bastards. (all e-types can be total bastards but 8 and 6cp often present in the classic 'bullying' type way when especially unhealthy.)
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  5. #5
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    8 is pretty much the robot of the Enneagram. 8 anger literally feels like a solid wall moving towards you. If an 8 is on your tail, he won't make you feel scared, he'll just coerce you into complying in the quickest, most pragmatic way possible.


    If someone's mistyped as an 8, they're probably a 3. 3 anger is much more personal, much less predictable, and much less scary. 3s will periodically release their anger in eruptions, and they'll only stop if you either 1) tell them what they want to hear, or 2) get them so angry that they disgrace themselves and soil their own image in front of their loyalest followers, forcing them to retreat and rebuild their damaged facade.




    3 has no tolerance for lack of ambition. They're naturally proactive and they want you to be proactive. When they "explode," they often attribute their anger to other people falling short of their visions.

    8 values constancy and productivity. If an 8 is your boss and you don't fulfill one of their commands, they get "mad" at you to force you to obey -- the anger is very mechanical and impersonal. If you're doing everything they say and following the rules, they'll completely leave you alone and possibly ignore you. 8 does not expect you to go above and beyond, only to meet your quota.




    8 doesn't have a sense of honor in the same way 3 does. 3 drastically regulates its behavior to appear socially acceptable. 8 abides by the laws of external structures and systems -- if you had seemingly unlimited power, the fastest way to graduate upwards to authority is by joining the authority.




    One weird thing I noticed about 8s is that they look very good in a photograph. They have a very pleasant smile, almost looking better than other types.

    A 3 in a photograph will often look either very over-the-top, or very calculated in his appearance.




    8 has no desire for fame, recognition, or the spotlight. They only want to be able to keep doing what they've been doing, and if you're incompetence is hindering them specifically, they'll target you. They'll shoot you down quickly and cleanly, and you'll probably forget it happened.


    3's fundamental desire is to be presentable. Often, this means fame and recognition. Other times, it means keeping quiet like a good citizen should do.




    8s tend to have more variety in their friendships. If you know an 8 who isn't in a position of authority over you, you're a half-decent person, and you're not causing any particular social trouble, an 8 may casually befriend you. They'll show affection when it's appropriate, but they're the most likely to spend more time on their work and less with other people.

    3s may often behave very aristocratically and reject certain people who fall outside of their class and/or criteria for what's appropriate. 8's criteria is a bit more lenient and focuses considerably less on appearance, but all on the "function" of the person and how they behave in the social "system."

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Starry View Post
    I love your post violett. Having read kyuuei's stuff for quite a few years now I know she fits your definition of 8 to a tee. There's another member as well. Since the day she first came here I have been convinced she is an 8 and yet I doubt she has ever even considered my typing due to 8's less than honorable reputation. And so yah...





    My concern though is merely that it be quite clear this is your opinion...your experience correct? That statement about counterphobia concerns me more than anything really. Reading this you would think...if the individual is a total bastard 8 is out of the question or something along those lines and that is just not true. Unhealthy 8s and 6cp can both be bastards. (all e-types can be total bastards but 8 and 6cp often present in the classic 'bullying' type way when especially unhealthy.)

    It has been my experience, you are correct. And you make a good point, my bias is rooted in being on the recieving end of CP6 bullying, but not having been on the receiving end of 8 bullying. I understand just because I haven't personally experienced the bullying of an 8, doesn't mean they are not capable of it.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by violett View Post
    It has been my experience, you are correct. And you make a good point, my bias is rooted in being on the recieving end of CP6 bullying, but not having been on the receiving end of 8 bullying. I understand just because I haven't personally experienced the bullying of an 8, doesn't mean they are not capable of it.

    I totally understand. And again, I think your description of the mindful 8 is one of the best I've read and I appreciate that.
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  8. #8
    Senior Member Entropic's Avatar
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    Some these things are a little off:

    Quote Originally Posted by violett View Post
    My father is an enneagram type 7w8. At times his wing influence is so strong he could be mistyped as an 8. Ime, with type 8's and those with a strong 8 wing, there is a over-riding sense of Honor in all that they do. They are open, honest and direct in their dealings with people. You always know what is on their minds and where they stand on any given issue. Also, you never wonder where you stand in relation to them. If there is something they don't like they tell you straight air it out and then seek resolution. Since 8's have a line to type 2, they are often generous with their time and energy and have a large circle of freinds (and sometimes have difficulty saying no, especially when it comes to their own children).
    8s can be generous when they feel like it, but they can also become really stingy when they feel like it, due to the connection to 5. This is especially true when it comes to dealing with other people and giving them attention. I do second the stuff about honor though. I think honor is an overall important concept for most 8s, even if you do not consciously experience it as something that you value.

    Also, a lot of 8s are quite isolated in how they lead their lives. They are contrary to having a large number of friends. Again, due to the connection to 5. I think you are confusing that with the more outgoing and boisterous attitude of type 7.

    They aren't known to hide and make petty swipes.
    Hide? No. 8s will make sure that you know what we think of you, but we can sure be petty.

    They are very much "what you see is what you get".
    Agreed.

    They also generally aren't known to attack or bully (that's the domain of CP6's).
    I have no idea what kind of picture you have of 6s and 8s here but, you are wrong. 8s can definitely be bullies. There's a reason the literature emphasizes the belligerent nature of type 8 and not in type 6.

    They also tend to engage in open dialogue and encourage open discussion because they value truth and honesty.
    Eh, not really. I think you need to read up more on the type. 8s value honesty and truth yes, but they also use the psychological mechanism of denial which means that they will deny other people their story of the truth whenever it suits the 8's fancy. Tom Condon uses the example of an 8 who made a waitress cry at a restaurant and denied any involvement in her crying, even though the 8's friend pointed out that it was his fault.

    Also, if they sense any kind of underlying issue which needs to be addressed they will bring it out into the open and confront head on.
    When it begins to bug them enough, yes.

    Also, They aren't petty, nit-picky, or critical people.
    Depends on what you mean with any of these things because I sure can be all of them just to get a fight going.

    Quote Originally Posted by Cygnus View Post
    8 has no desire for fame, recognition, or the spotlight. They only want to be able to keep doing what they've been doing, and if you're incompetence is hindering them specifically, they'll target you. They'll shoot you down quickly and cleanly, and you'll probably forget it happened.
    Don't have much else to add on the other points, they seem overall apt, but I do want to comment on this one because it's so accurate, LOL.

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  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by Cygnus View Post
    8 is pretty much the robot of the Enneagram. 8 anger literally feels like a solid wall moving towards you. If an 8 is on your tail, he won't make you feel scared, he'll just coerce you into complying in the quickest, most pragmatic way possible.
    Bullshit. Bowing down to an unhealthy 8 feels more like kneeling at the chasm of hell and being hugged by a red blaze of hellish molten fury.



  10. #10
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    I apppreciate your imput. I wrote about my personal experience with my father as a type 8, naturally not all 7w8's are going to be exactly like him. I understand, in an effort to maintain clarity I could have made sure to added disclaimers. Maybe from now on that's what I will do, I will be certain add an author's note at the end of any description I write about my personal experiences so that anyone who reads won't become confused about my intention, kind of like common sense warning labels used on the sides of packaging or directions which most people understand without being told, but inevitably someone will come along and say, but you didn't tell us we weren't supposed to

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