People who type 4s put way too much weight on the stereotypical descriptions, and not enough on the basics (the 4's core fears/desires, (dis)integration and feedback loops). I believe a couple of INFPs here, even, are mistyped p6w7s and 9w1s, but I am of course relying on forum personas which don't always correspond to reality. Basically...I won't push it.
Re OP's question, I don't have any 4s in my day to day life, but if I did, I actually doubt that we'd get on well.
A lot of 4s seem to be INFPs; 9 fixed and very strong Feelers.
I am quite different - cold, harsh and bound to offend your delicate sensibilities.
I am also prone to envy, and can become very defensive of anything I consider to be part of my identity. My apologies for being vague here, but I'd rather not get into specifics.
I understand. I don't have "delicate" sensibilities. In fact, that's partly the reason why I have a hard time embracing 4. There's a kind of dandyism to how the type manifests among people that makes me cringe.
The only way out is through. The faster you're in, the better.