I shall start with a few which have been on my mind for awhile
dear 2s: silly little vixen. your childish games won't work on me. you like to act like you're so innocent, like all you want is a "little bit of fun" or "somebody to love"....but that's all bullshit. what you really are is an emotional predator. you entice your victims, sooth their insecurities and vulnerabilities and fill in the holes in their emotional well being, but, at the end of the day, all you really want to do is suck them dry emotionally to sustain your need for drama and emotional sustenance. to anyone with an ounce of perception, it's as obvious as the ending of a Disney movie.
dear 3s: I am not interested in the social dance that is the dialogue you make with people 60% of the time. when you ask me a question, I am going to answer honestly. I don't care about how I "should" answer, I don't care about how my answer will come across and I certainly don't care if my answer expresses something about who I am....cuz you're the one who asked. when I'm at work, I'm there to do a job. nothing more, nothing less. I have no intention of looking like some role model character from Leave it to Beaver because I'm not. I'm not always a good person, I have opinions and habits that would offend some people and...at the end of the day, yes, I'm doing it for the money because I love nice clothes, good food and passionate sex....and I don't see why in the hell I should have to appear otherwise. if you want to live your cookie cutter lifestyle in your nice lil neighborhood with your corporate job, white picket fence and golden retriever....be my guest, but leave those of us who are more interesting out of it.
dear counter-phobic 6s: you are the ultimate case of "can dish it out but not take it". when you insult me out of the blue and I respond with a witty comeback which slaps you in the face, you messed with the bull, you got the horns.....now deal with it and stop trying to act all offended. "how dare he stand up for himself!".....seriously, that's how dumb you sound, especially when I probably let you off easy (ie, with a comeback that was more funny than insulting) if you really want to prove yourself so bad, take up a martial art, get a degree in a competitive program, try and start a business...anything for a more productive way to test your mettle which will actually help you grow and actually allow you to face your fears.