I suppose this is a bit inspired by the type vs. type threads to discuss differences, but I'm interested in discussing relational combinations (platonic and/or romantic). The interaction between 4 and 7 has quite intrigued me of late in several incidences so I'd love to hear other stories or relational experiences with this combo (good or bad).
You can find Enneagram Institute's take on the general 4 + 7 relationship here.
As a 4, my experience with 7 female friends has been almost non-existent (even though I'm fond of a couple) because they frankly don't have time to know others or be known. There is one in particular who I volunteer alongside who is quite literally a social butterfly, I believe she's actually So-first. When she enters a room, she flits around it hugging and greeting people warmly but briefly. One week when she turned to hug me and say "how are you!" (as a statement, not an actual question), I simply said, "you know, I don't know you." I think it confused her at first, but the next week she understood and we actually made plans to hang out for the first time. I'm so glad we did because one-on-one or in a small group, she is so much more intentional and open. It has been a struggle to spend time with her since as she travels a lot for work and packs her schedule to the brim, so I've sort of just surrendered. Sad that.
My experience with male 7's has happily surprised me, though I'm totally aware that they probably have tenancies similar to my above female friend. There's an Sx-first 7w8 (I believe) that I've been getting to know who I've found so much common ground with so far. The main thing I respect about him is his independence, because it matches my own (if in a slightly different way). He does what he wants, says what he thinks and seems to never consider what others might think of it. A measure of this: no one ever approaches me in social settings because I have a tendency to close myself off, either alone or with whomever I'm talking to. This guy does! It's like he doesn't see the glass walls everyone else senses around me. It's not like he rudely shatters them either, he just walks over, very purposefully sits or stands by me and enters the conversation. There's nothing I appreciate more than someone who can approach me that way, it's like he shouldered the risk in the situation so I wouldn't have to. We share a love of adventure and the outdoors, and he actually does have his own sense of style. I've also noted an appreciation for beauty in him that I wouldn't have immediately guessed, though I suppose in a Sx-first 7 the point would be to experience and become one with the beauty-- and then move on. That's the part that I've been trying to keep at the forefront of my mind, I've been a bit more guarded that I normally am because I don't see the point in being vulnerable if he might just get distracted and move on. One other interesting thing, I've noticed we kind of connect at 5 a little-- his integration to it, and my heavy wing. I've realized right away not to analyze him though (this means no Enneagram talk, he knows what it is but doesn't want to be "boxed in"), which I'm fine with.
Well that's my two cents, anyone else care to share what the 4 + 7 relationship looks like?