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Anger and Enneagram

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
This is definitely true for me. Especially if the other person is upset with me as well, I take it as something wrong with *me*, even if I know they're in the wrong.

I haven't figured out my family's enneatypes yet, but based on the descriptions of type anger, my mother is either a 1 or a 7... Hmm.

1 anger is critical, not like the OP describes, and a 7s anger will be highly influenced by their gut fix, a 7 with a 9 fix would only want to see the positive, with an 8 fix would be able to be assertive and get what they want whilst keeping people onside through keeping things fun and light most of the time, a 7 with a 1 fix would be softer in regards to anger than the 8 fix however they would have firmer boundaries I would expect.
 

Evo

Unapologetic being
Joined
Jul 1, 2011
Messages
3,160
MBTI Type
XNTJ
Enneagram
1w9
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
This is a 6 that is really angry. They killed his one son and captured a second one (Heath Ledger) just prior to this.


Sounds about right.
 

tralala

New member
Joined
Dec 2, 2013
Messages
17
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w7
Speaking on behalf of ENTJs, 8s who get angered go and build monuments.
 

tralala

New member
Joined
Dec 2, 2013
Messages
17
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
8w7
True.

Only to realize who angered them were only misguided, and it gave meaning to the journey.
 

Amargith

Hotel California
Joined
Nov 5, 2008
Messages
14,717
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
4dw
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I am quite honestly jealous of your ability to outwardly rage so beautifully and freely. Curse your glorious 68ism! Curse my lame 79ism of holding inwards!!

Tell me about it!

Oh to be able to harness my wing better and get the right level of assertive before the 9 suppression instincts override things. Pretty sure the 4 doesn't help the combo as it's quite happy to throw the anger inwardly and scratch all the emotional scabs, meanwhile 7 just wants to stay positive while 9 doesn't feel like it has a right to be angry. Blah.

*steals Dominos mojo*

QFT.

I think we need to hire Domino to speak at our monthly 479 tritype meetings. Lesson One: How to Be Angry At the Entire World While Looking Like a Model.

- On topic edit -

I read how this type with 4 in charge is the "positive 4". Which I think with 7's desire to be positive with people, 9's desire to just lay back and think of Estonia... the negative feelings I love to wallow in as a 4 end up turning inwards against me. So I may be all cuddly cheer on the outside, but it's probably in direct proportion to the amount of broken glass and bleeding soul is going on inside me.

OMG, lessons with Domino would be epic offtopicness that I would pay money for! :happy2:

Yup. Positive types are 2-7-9, that's the reason it was so hard for me to find my heart fix, the 7 and 9 make it so I feel as though I have to show only positive things to the world, that if I show negativity it will result in rejection so the 4 fix is very internal and as my shame point results in a lot of conflicting feelings leaving me really not wanting to show that side of myself to anyone because it feels like some kind of failing.


:yes:

I do find that I can - nowadays - ...parse and harness my anger and forge it as a weapon. Is that the 4 sx-so thing perhaps? Does anyone else relate?

What I mean is...I'll first need to fully flesh out through 4-9 and my w5 *why* Im angry and if I have a right to take it out on the object of my rage. Usually, I come to the conclusion that I don't. But just coz I walk away doesn't mean that the anger is gone or that I don't put it to good use. It is rare, but some people are stupid enough to interpret that move as weakness and press their presumed advantage. It takes me not even a split second to show them just exactly how big their mistake is, usually - depending on whether it is worth it or not. Some take the hint and run. Others are stupid enough to jump into the volcano. As it is their choice, I'm happy to oblige :coffee:

Again, it is something that happens once in a blue moon though. Considering the power anger can hold, I only employ when absolutely needed.

I've also been known to deliberately *show* people just a glimpse what lies under the sweet, positive side of me, just to push them into making the right decision about me. Or to make them realise that their...assumptions wrt my character are deeply flawed. And I have on occasion been asked if I realised that I suddenly came off as intensely threatening, just for a split second. I do. It's on purpose, folks. And for a good cause. We usually get along a lot better afterwards, I find.
 

Galena

Silver and Lead
Joined
Mar 12, 2013
Messages
3,786
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
The 4 description is on the money here.

[MENTION=13402]Saturned[/MENTION] [MENTION=5494]Amargith[/MENTION] [MENTION=4324]Kasper[/MENTION], I feel you. It must be the 9 fix. With 4, it makes it difficult experience anger as directed at things other than myself. It is probable that I am in fact angry at many things, but I turn it on me to avoid the storm of releasing it into the wild, so quickly that I cannot always catch what it was about in the beginning. I am practiced and adept at dealing with internal conflict, but am clumsy with external. The exception is where 6 comes in: if I know the circumstances are safe and fitting for it, I can express anger as freely and venomously as anyone. My contradiction becomes visible: fear influences and guards me, but I also have a passionate hatred for fear that surpasses little else. That's where 469 is between 468 and 479 on anger: not positive, not oppositional; not shitting, not getting off the pot. :dry:

Where are the other 469/964/649/etc people? I want a club, too.
 

Domino

ENFJ In Chains
Joined
Nov 5, 2007
Messages
11,429
MBTI Type
eNFJ
Enneagram
4w3
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Now I simply wish to lie back and think about Estonia.
 

autumnandtherain

New member
Joined
Aug 10, 2013
Messages
185
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I think 1s would experience exasperated and somewhat explosive anger, it would seem that they would be completely tired of dealing with the problem and would react explosively and sporadically to contradict their predictability and structured nature.

I think 4s would experience a self-destructive and implosive anger, but much more vividly than a 2. They would feel as if the whole world had turned against them because they were defective and would either take the path of condemning one's self (the contradiction of their nature) or attempting to dispel others away from themselves so that they can't be emotionally harmed.
1 anger is critical, not like the OP describes, and a 7s anger will be highly influenced by their gut fix, a 7 with a 9 fix would only want to see the positive, with an 8 fix would be able to be assertive and get what they want whilst keeping people onside through keeping things fun and light most of the time, a 7 with a 1 fix would be softer in regards to anger than the 8 fix however they would have firmer boundaries I would expect.

That makes sense. Were you thinking my anger sounds like a 1's?
 
A

Anew Leaf

Guest
QFT.






:yes:

I do find that I can - nowadays - ...parse and harness my anger and forge it as a weapon. Is that the 4 sx-so thing perhaps? Does anyone else relate?

Ohhh yes I can relate. I just have a hard time USING it as an appropriate weapon. I think my best use of it was a few years back when my grandma passed away and my mom's siblings were being rude to my mom and basically all of them acting like these were children again. So I had enough and sat them all down and just unleashed upon them that if they didn't behave I was going to give them a Time Out. My Aunt tried interrupting me with some angry outburst that normally I would let happen and roll off of me.. but that time I interrupted her and told her to sit down and shut up because I had the floor.

I think it really only worked because they had never seen me angry before and they were so shocked that that alone cowed them into obeying me for a couple of days.

However, I sort of have to be backed into the corner on such a thing where I require the righteous fury of Fi to allow an override of the 9 "grit your teeth and play nice" protocol system.

What I mean is...I'll first need to fully flesh out through 4-9 and my w5 *why* Im angry and if I have a right to take it out on the object of my rage. Usually, I come to the conclusion that I don't. But just coz I walk away doesn't mean that the anger is gone or that I don't put it to good use. It is rare, but some people are stupid enough to interpret that move as weakness and press their presumed advantage. It takes me not even a split second to show them just exactly how big their mistake is, usually - depending on whether it is worth it or not. Some take the hint and run. Others are stupid enough to jump into the volcano. As it is their choice, I'm happy to oblige :coffee:

Again, it is something that happens once in a blue moon though. Considering the power anger can hold, I only employ when absolutely needed.

I've also been known to deliberately *show* people just a glimpse what lies under the sweet, positive side of me, just to push them into making the right decision about me. Or to make them realise that their...assumptions wrt my character are deeply flawed. And I have on occasion been asked if I realised that I suddenly came off as intensely threatening, just for a split second. I do. It's on purpose, folks. And for a good cause. We usually get along a lot better afterwards, I find.

I can relate to this stuff as well. It's just so easy to look at myself being angry and thinking, there are better ways to expend this energy or it's easier to just let it go because then I don't have to deal with the unpleasantness of the other person's (wrong *coughs*) viewpoint.

I feel like I need to learn a better relationship with anger because it IS useful at times and good to express. I just tend to suppress it and deal with it internally far too often as then I can control all the variables.

*makes mental note to start showing that the kitten paw has a tip of claw every now and again with people*


The 4 description is on the money here.

[MENTION=13402]Saturned[/MENTION] [MENTION=5494]Amargith[/MENTION] [MENTION=4324]Kasper[/MENTION], I feel you. It must be the 9 fix. With 4, it makes it difficult experience anger as directed at things other than myself. It is probable that I am in fact angry at many things, but I turn it on me to avoid the storm of releasing it into the wild, so quickly that I cannot always catch what it was about in the beginning. I am practiced and adept at dealing with internal conflict, but am clumsy with external. The exception is where 6 comes in: if I know the circumstances are safe and fitting for it, I can express anger as freely and venomously as anyone. My contradiction becomes visible: fear influences and guards me, but I also have a passionate hatred for fear that surpasses little else. That's where 469 is between 468 and 479 on anger: not positive, not oppositional; not shitting, not getting off the pot. :dry:

Where are the other 469/964/649/etc people? I want a club, too.

You can hang out with us if your club is too lonely. *bakes cookies* It's just far too easy to want to deal with "all the things" on one's own. Possibly because of control isses as well.

I also have dealt with a lot of family members who had anger issues and let their anger cause rifts and grudges that never healed. And life is just too short for such a pointless waste of the time spent on Earth. I don't want to be like that. And it could be a slippery slope...

Now I simply wish to lie back and think about Estonia.

*writes on notecard* Be more like Domino.
 

Chad of the OttomanEmpire

Give me a fourth dot.
Joined
Jun 9, 2013
Messages
1,053
MBTI Type
NeTi
Enneagram
478
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I think 4s would experience a self-destructive and implosive anger, but much more vividly than a 2. They would feel as if the whole world had turned against them because they were defective and would either take the path of condemning one's self (the contradiction of their nature) or attempting to dispel others away from themselves so that they can't be emotionally harmed.
I'm a 4, and this is actually somewhat true. I mean, I can get angry for a variety of reasons, but I know the phenomenon of which you speak. It's like when someone says to me, "You need to be more __________." And I'll be stuck between hating myself for not measuring up to society's standards, or else fly into a rage, "WHO THE HELL ARE YOU TO TELL ME WHAT I NEED TO BE MORE OF? GOD???"...storm out of the room.

I think 8s would be an explosive anger, but infinitely more intense than a 1. An eight would contradict their nature of guarding themselves emotionally by opening up and letting their built-up of anger fly out of them, this is the type that would break a table in half in front of a crowd of people because someone said something that deeply hurt them.
The hurt doesn't feel like hurt, though. It feels like rage. It's often directed against the perpetrator themself, rather than just breaking a random object in half. Definitely explosive, more immediate than a 1, more easily gotten over as well.

I have no idea what 9 anger is like, if you know, do tell. (Do 9s even get angry?)
I have two 9-parents, and with them it's more like the outward rage of the 8 combined with the pent-up self-righteous fury of the 1. I've seldom seen it, but when they get mad, they get MAD. Scare the shit out of me--not least of which because I never see it coming. Small things tend to set off a backlog of rage.

PS--I love Hannibal Barca.
 

Azure Flame

Permabanned
Joined
Aug 26, 2010
Messages
2,317
MBTI Type
ESTP
Enneagram
8w7
8w7s are protected by the RAGEFIELD (similar to a forcefield)
8w9's are protected by their own obliviousness, up until they retard strength their offenders into submission.
 

Chad of the OttomanEmpire

Give me a fourth dot.
Joined
Jun 9, 2013
Messages
1,053
MBTI Type
NeTi
Enneagram
478
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
I do find that I can - nowadays - ...parse and harness my anger and forge it as a weapon. Is that the 4 sx-so thing perhaps? Does anyone else relate?.
I'm closer to [MENTION=1456]Domino[/MENTION]--the rage is just there. For me, it's more about learning to focus the rage, but yes, I'm still learning to do just what you say. DON'T storm out. DON'T throw a tantrum. Use it as a weapon. With this power I can dismantle the status quo!!
 

Haven

Blind Guardian
Joined
Apr 26, 2011
Messages
1,075
MBTI Type
ESFJ
Enneagram
2w3
Instinctual Variant
so/sp
I think 2s would experience a self-destructive and implosive anger, they would feel emotionally betrayed and fragile and would become guarded to contradict their giving and open nature.

2s self destruct, but it's not how you think


9s are like The Hulk when it comes to anger
 

autumnandtherain

New member
Joined
Aug 10, 2013
Messages
185
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
It sounded most like 1, could possibly be 9 though. Definitely not 8.

Oh, I wasn't thinking 8. I was thinking more 4. It could be 1, but in other ways I think I'm a lot more 4 than 1.
 

Kasper

Diabolical
Joined
May 30, 2008
Messages
11,590
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
so/sx
Oh, I wasn't thinking 8. I was thinking more 4. It could be 1, but in other ways I think I'm a lot more 4 than 1.

I was only looking at the anger point, a persons relationship with anger says more about their anger point then head-heart point IMO.
 
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