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The Hardest Type to be in The Enneagram

Lady_X

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ENFP
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sx/sp
Type 7 would just say no I'm good it's all going to be fine. Really don't worry about it.
 
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Stansmith

Guest
This has nothing to do with integration or health. This is more a matter of not being physically, mentally or emotionally active.

Find some fun things to do.


Fun has no purpose to me. You have fun, go home, and then what? The feeling doesn't last, and you're still in the same place you were before. Directionless and empty.
 
0

011235813

Guest
Fun has no purpose to me. You have fun, go home, and then what? The feeling doesn't last, and you're still in the same place you were before. Directionless and empty.

Fulfilling, then. Find some fulfilling things to do. And keep some of them at home as well.

:shrug:
 

Evo

Unapologetic being
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1w9
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sp/sx
I certainly get your point, but as an 18 year old in the prime of his life, I'd much rather have e7 problems than e6. I see the value in being an e6 troubleshooter when you're in your 30s or 40s, but being an e6 is a teenager or young adult is an absolute waste of youth. You should be happy go-lucky, whimsical, euphoric and impulsive at 18 years old, that's the point of youth. You have lots of fun, f-ck up a bunch of times, and move forward. As a young 6, you're basically behaving like an old woman and depriving yourself of any worthwhile experiences.

I'm almost ten yrs older than you...and I still feel this way :(

I am finding that the more everyday goes by...the more I deprive myself. (WTF self?)

I hate it

And so now I've made it my goal to feel like I've lived the life I wanna live by 30 lol.

It is a terrible feeling though, I do agree it's difficult being a six

Everything is relative I guess...

But if you were to make a 6 a rich person....

and a 3 a starving homeless person....

I can see the comparison...the 3 probably will move up in the world...at least the physically and money-wise...(maybe not metaphysical or emotional)

But the 6 will be paraniod...and still not be happy...They would prolly think people are gonna try to kill them for thier money or something of that 6ish paranoia nature lol ( I know I would...sad...cause I know that it's a RE-fucking-DICULOUS paranoia lmao) damn being a 6!! gah:doh:

So I see where you're coming from...
 
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Stansmith

Guest
I'm almost ten yrs older than you...and I still feel this way :(

I am finding that the more everyday goes by...the more I deprive myself. (WTF self?)

I hate it

And so now I've made it my goal to feel like I've lived the life I wanna live by 30 lol.

It is a terrible feeling though, I do agree it's difficult being a six

Everything is relative I guess...

But if you were to make a 6 a rich person....

and a 3 a starving homeless person....

I can see the comparison...the 3 probably will move up in the world...at least the physically and money-wise...(maybe not metaphysical or emotional)

But the 6 will be paraniod...and still not be happy...They would prolly think people are gonna try to kill them for thier money or something of that 6ish paranoia nature lol ( I know I would...sad...cause I know that it's a RE-fucking-DICULOUS paranoia lmao) damn being a 6!! gah:doh:

So I see where you're coming from...

The 3 would probably go insane because of the sudden shift in status and either become a sadist or commit suicide. In the 6-situation I would just buy a bunch of stuff, post pictures of my luxury lifestyle on instagram, tumblr and twitter, and everything would fall into place.

A homeless 3 could "rise out of the ashes" so-to-speak, but they'd be doing it with raggedy smelly clothes and ungroomed hair. It'd be embarassing. They'd have to rob Dior or Louis Vuitton and break into someone's house for a decent shower, maybe even save up change for a nice haircut.
 

Zarathustra

Let Go Of Your Team
Joined
Oct 31, 2009
Messages
8,110
I'm almost ten yrs older than you...and I still feel this way :(

I am finding that the more everyday goes by...the more I deprive myself. (WTF self?)

I hate it

And so now I've made it my goal to feel like I've lived the life I wanna live by 30 lol.

It is a terrible feeling though, I do agree it's difficult being a six

Everything is relative I guess...

But if you were to make a 6 a rich person....

and a 3 a starving homeless person....

I can see the comparison...the 3 probably will move up in the world...at least the physically and money-wise...(maybe not metaphysical or emotional)

But the 6 will be paraniod...and still not be happy...They would prolly think people are gonna try to kill them for thier money or something of that 6ish paranoia nature lol ( I know I would...sad...cause I know that it's a RE-fucking-DICULOUS paranoia lmao) damn being a 6!! gah:doh:

So I see where you're coming from...

This, like the OP, is putting way too much emphasis on type, and way too little on health level.
 

Zarathustra

Let Go Of Your Team
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Oct 31, 2009
Messages
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While I don't agree that removing the anxiety is the best course of action, I think that in this instance integrating to nine is what would allow us to finally focus, not remove, the anxiety; I would even postulate that it would seem poorly reasoned to assume that integrating to nine would erase worry. Nines themselves deny it, but as the six is hardly capable of repressing it, the correct integration is to focus on a singular issue, to determine whether the problem is actually intrinsic or extrinsic, and then gain the determination and skill to uproot the origin. The integration to nine isn't a shield or sword, sixes have plenty of those, it is the dart that hits precisely the point necessary to incapacitate the argument of the antagonizations.

That would be your addiction to the anxiety speaking.

When you're integrating, the anxiety will just fall away for the most part.

The anxiety comes from lack of faith/cowardice, and goes away with faith/courage.

It will always be there, ready to come back, but the more you integrate, the more it will go away.

http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/articles/NArtLevels.asp#.Uf1mJtIp-Sp
 

Azure Flame

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ESTP
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8w7
E8 is by no means easy. Try living a life where everyone hates you, and when you're nice, everyone bullies you. When you're successful, everyone is jealous of you. Your bosses think you're a threat to their position, you get fired for being yourself, etc. Jealous co-workers form groups behind your back in order to trash your reputation and take you down when you're successful. Niceness is interpreted as weakness, and people get frustrated because they can't change you, and decide to make your life hell instead. Those who you decide to help, turn against you and try to make your life miserable when you stop helping them. Everyone is dependant upon you, 90% of women you meet are broken and need someone like you to solve all of their problems. Life often feels like you're a mortal journeying through hell, where the rest of the world complains of misery and wallows in their excrement and petty anxieties, and there's nothing you can do to help because it would turn you into one of them.
 
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ReflecTcelfeR

Guest
That would be your addiction to the anxiety speaking.

When you're integrating, the anxiety will just fall away for the most part.

The anxiety comes from lack of faith/cowardice, and goes away with faith/courage.

It will always be there, ready to come back, but the more you integrate, the more it will go away.

http://www.enneagraminstitute.com/articles/NArtLevels.asp#.Uf1mJtIp-Sp

I believe my point corresponds most appropriately toward the section of imitating the type in order to solve the problems, and how this isn't the effective way to "integrate". As I remember him suggesting earlier that integrating into the nine made him feel boring and uneventful and at this may have been the issue. This would definitely be a good article for the OP to read as well.

I do agree on the point of my addiction, I believe it is evident in me, to anyone who knows me that even resolved issues still cause me dilemmas and too much heart-ache. I suppose also I was trying to qualify what faith/courage really means to me and perhaps I am embittered and battle focused, and so it is more a white-flag than anything.

I have noticed though that 9's serenity to me has a tendency to feel sluggish and perhaps I integrated at the wrong level since lateral movement at the low level does not put me far enough into the positive aspects of nine.

As well, I find that there is never enough admission of fear to help me move beyond my fear. I have spent copious amounts of time trying my best to admit all my fears and perceived failings in order that hopefully I could overcome them if I did not find them enemies, but then reality and its harshness did set in... So we could probably chalk it up to bad timing; however, I will say that fear or courage is provoking me towards my studies so in that I also agree, and I am seeing a new tendency of actually learning that my fears aren't' necessarily real instead of rationalizing them into oblivion.

I do realize that perhaps I wasn't actually relinquishing myself to the fears because I was rationalizing instead of solving and now the line is mucked.
 

Azure Flame

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Regardless, I don't want to dally in a debate of syntax and subjectivity.

All types have their problems, and if you can't see them, you aren't looking hard enough.
 

Azure Flame

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Always having to be the top dog, unable to be vulnerable in relationships or to admit to having insecurities/demons?

8's have no problem admitting to their demons and insecurities unless they're 12 years old. But they are scared to come out of their emotional turtle shell. One of my biggest fears is revealing the kid inside of me. Usually when I do, I lose a lot of respect from people and even make E3's jealous to the point that they attack me in some way, and even E6's will attack me when I'm feeling most comfortable with them, for reasons I still don't understand.
 

Zarathustra

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E8 is by no means easy. Try living a life where everyone hates you, and when you're nice, everyone bullies you. When you're successful, everyone is jealous of you. Your bosses think you're a threat to their position, you get fired for being yourself, etc. Jealous co-workers form groups behind your back in order to trash your reputation and take you down when you're successful. Niceness is interpreted as weakness, and people get frustrated because they can't change you, and decide to make your life hell instead. Those who you decide to help, turn against you and try to make your life miserable when you stop helping them. Everyone is dependant upon you, 90% of women you meet are broken and need someone like you to solve all of their problems. Life often feels like you're a mortal journeying through hell, where the rest of the world complains of misery and wallows in their excrement and petty anxieties, and there's nothing you can do to help because it would turn you into one of them.

You realize this is all your own fault, right?

It's cuz you're an [asp/mole].
 
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Starry

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Largely because of this thread, this morning I was thinking about the effect of positive thinking on one's ability to accurately assess a situation and form objective judgements about things. I used to think about this a lot, years ago, and sided with being objective over being positive... I think, ultimately, what you gotta realize is: when is it time/what are the things about which I must put on the serious face and be all objective-like, and when are the times/what are the things about which it's better to just put on a smile and be a positive force.

Exactly. Maintaining a positive outlook/attitude... which would include behaviors and actions such as... letting things 'roll off you', ignoring/looking past mistakes, annoyances and flaws in order to give people the benefit of the doubt when working with co-workers & clients... <--that's just smart (it's actually good business sense). That's definitely going work in your favor.

Maintaining a positive outlook/attitude when there's a gigantic hole in the bottom of the boat you're in...and it's rapidly taking in water <--now, I've learned through first-hand experience that *positivity* still 'has its place' in these type of scenarios...and can still aid in bringing about a positive outcome... But that this tends to work best when there are others in the boat with you. And you sure the fuck better hope those others are like e1s or e5s or e8s...

Fuck everything else, having a positive attitude just makes life more enjoyable.

Yes. And being alive also makes life more enjoyable.


As for your description, Starry, that's how I've always felt about e7s (and e3s, in a similar, albeit somewhat different way): under the positivity on the surface lies what likely either is or has a very good chance of turning into a train wreck, due to unwillingness to realistically/objectively assess what is going on in their lives. "Oh, yeah, snorting this line and having sex with this stranger who I'm pretending is my super close friend but who I really don't know jackshit about is EXACTLY what will make my life PERFECT right now *brushes under the rug the fact that if he/she had to spend the next hour alone in a room they would probably drive themselves up the fucking walls trying to not think about everything that's going wrong in their life that they're actually CONSTANTLY trying to not think about/avoid, and thus never actually effectively dealing with/resolving* *snnnnnnnnnort* *awwww* *where were we?*"

Sure. The only thing that I find troubling whenever this topic comes up... And you get someone saying precisely what you said above...followed by all the subsequent..."omg, totally! my hedonistic 7w6 friend did a room full of guys all while high on meth, red-bull, cold-medicine, paint-thinner, vodka, laundry-softener & heroin... in order to forget about the fight she had earlier with her sister!" <--is because I was at the party. I was at the party and I assure you... there were people from all types there including e6...many of them outdoing any damage I could ever have done. I just like to (always) take this opportunity to point out that not every male or female whore-junkie is an e7. There are many ways to escape negative thoughts...and it is most often the case that an e7 will employ alternative strategies than what is outlined above. But will they then be recognized as being e7? Perhaps not.

[edit: there are so many ENFP mistypes out there because of this understanding of the e7. I can think of 3 here off the top of my head.]


The distraction thing is true... Constantly filling up your head with things... Over analyzing things to death, researching shit online... Often just random what if or this would be cool interesting shit that has no basis on your actual immediate reality... Cuz yeah that stuff is often too stressful to deal with.

And the messed up part is that we don't even know we're doing it most of the time. It just is the way we naturally conduct ourselves.

I hate it.

Totally. e7 sx...actually uses introspection to escape.
 

Azure Flame

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You realize this is all your own fault, right?

It's cuz you're an [excellent basketball player].

Objectively yes. But you fail to understand why its a necessity.

Who I am, when I'm in a good healthy mood, is grounds enough to still rile others up enough to cause me pain, either out of jealousy or other reasons.
 
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Stansmith

Guest
Exactly. Maintaining a positive outlook/attitude... which would include behaviors and actions such as... letting things 'roll off you', ignoring/looking past mistakes, annoyances and flaws in order to give people the benefit of the doubt when working with co-workers & clients... <--that's just smart (it's actually good business sense). That's definitely going work in your favor.

Maintaining a positive outlook/attitude when there's a gigantic hole in the bottom of the boat you're in...and it's rapidly taking in water <--now, I've learned through first-hand experience that *positivity* still 'has its place' in these type of scenarios...and can still aid in bringing about a positive outcome... But that this tends to work best when there are others in the boat with you. And you sure the fuck better hope those others are like e1s or e5s or e8s...



Yes. And being alive also makes life more enjoyable.




Sure. The only thing that I find troubling whenever this topic comes up... And you get someone saying precisely what you said above...followed by all the subsequent..."omg, totally! my hedonistic 7w6 friend did a room full of guys all while high on meth, red-bull, cold-medicine, paint-thinner, vodka, laundry-softener & heroin... in order to forget about the fight she had earlier with her sister!" <--is because I was at the party. I was at the party and I assure you... there were people from all types including e6...many of them outdoing any damage I could ever have done. I just like to (always) take this opportunity to point out that not every male or female whore-junkie is an e7. There are many ways to escape negative thoughts...and it is most often the case that an e7 will employ alternative strategies than what is outlined above. But will they then be recognized as actually being e7? Perhaps not.




Totally. e7 sx...actually uses introspection to escape.

CP6's can be equally wreckless. 7's are hedonistic for it's own sake (although there's fear/anhedonia deep down) while cp6s are hedonistic to consciously soothe their anxiety.
 
S

Stansmith

Guest
E8 is by no means easy. Try living a life where everyone hates you, and when you're nice, everyone bullies you. When you're successful, everyone is jealous of you. Your bosses think you're a threat to their position, you get fired for being yourself, etc. Jealous co-workers form groups behind your back in order to trash your reputation and take you down when you're successful. Niceness is interpreted as weakness, and people get frustrated because they can't change you, and decide to make your life hell instead. Those who you decide to help, turn against you and try to make your life miserable when you stop helping them. Everyone is dependant upon you, 90% of women you meet are broken and need someone like you to solve all of their problems. Life often feels like you're a mortal journeying through hell, where the rest of the world complains of misery and wallows in their excrement and petty anxieties, and there's nothing you can do to help because it would turn you into one of them.

Only people I see doing that are 6s, 3s, and other 8s
 

Zarathustra

Let Go Of Your Team
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Objectively yes. But you fail to understand why its a necessity.

Who I am, when I'm in a good healthy mood, is grounds enough to still rile others up enough to cause me pain, either out of jealousy or other reasons.

No, it's still cuz you're an [olfactory disaster].

I have a friend who is an e8.

He just naturally assumes he's the boss, no matter where he is, no matter the situation.

But there's really nothing about him, other than his constant attempt to claim that mantle, and the fact that he's rather large, and he's loud as shit, why he should be so. And so all our friends give him endless amounts of shit. He gets shit on more than just about anyone, among 100+ individuals, essentially entirely because of how he comports himself.

We still all love him, and our friends donated tens of thousands of dollars to his political campaign when he ran for Congress at 28, but we still give him endless amounts of shit, and he deserves every ounce of it.
 
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