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  1. #1
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    Default Does guilt hold you back?

    I am starting to see the Five in me. It makes so much sense now. I often find myself retreating and I guess evaluating how I feel about the situation and feeling so much guilt and regret. It just holds me back. I'm a Four to, so I guess you can see the mix. I also went through a period of depression, so I believe that contributes to it. So I guess my bigger question is, are Fives better off living a life that can't create any guilt or is that an impossible goal? Maybe the less screw ups the better? I guess that goes for anybody. I just feel the more guilt I have the more I retreat and screw things up. I think I'm a Nine too, so I think the combination of all three types, makes me prone to feeling like an underdog and failure. I can't tell if that is really my anger type though, because I have pretty big tantrums, but I nap a lot...

  2. #2
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    No, I live life in the present moment, the moment that is the sum total of all past phenomenon, and the forge for the future. The past is a record we can reflect upon to do better with future developments. We just learn from our mistakes, get back up, and keep moving.

  3. #3
    Senior Member Entropic's Avatar
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    No, I don't experience guilt. Why should I? I only got a competency superego drive that tells me to live up to my own standards but that's pretty much it. The rest are all id connections that tell me what I want when I want it and tell me to go get it because I want it.

    I was waiting for the day you and I would meet.

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  4. #4
    Fair and Square Flatlander's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Newbyagain View Post
    I am starting to see the Five in me. It makes so much sense now. I often find myself retreating and I guess evaluating how I feel about the situation and feeling so much guilt and regret. It just holds me back. I'm a Four to, so I guess you can see the mix. I also went through a period of depression, so I believe that contributes to it. So I guess my bigger question is, are Fives better off living a life that can't create any guilt or is that an impossible goal? Maybe the less screw ups the better? I guess that goes for anybody. I just feel the more guilt I have the more I retreat and screw things up. I think I'm a Nine too, so I think the combination of all three types, makes me prone to feeling like an underdog and failure. I can't tell if that is really my anger type though, because I have pretty big tantrums, but I nap a lot...
    Guilt and regret?

    I work on the idea that it's necessary to move on in life. I've had guilt and regret before, most people have I'm sure no matter what their enneagram type, but when I have the feelings I don't wallow in them, I think through what went wrong to figure it out and live on because reality doesn't change or stop moving for feelings.
    Thinking must serve the thinker.

  5. #5
    Blood of the Exile Animal's Avatar
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    8-4-5 here.

    Guilt doesn't hold me back. In fact, for better or worse, I'm not very prone to guilt and shame at all. Regret motivates me to take a good, hard look at myself and make a major comeback next time.

    There's no point doing this:
    Art is the blood of the Exile
    4w3 6w7 8w9 ~ Sx/Sp ~ ISTP ~ LSI-Se

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maybe View Post
    8-4-5 here.

    Guilt doesn't hold me back. In fact, for better or worse, I'm not very prone to guilt and shame at all. Regret motivates me to take a good, hard look at myself and make a major comeback next time.

    There's no point doing this:
    That is exactly why both times I have been like this in my life, when I'm around Eights it's like somehow your energy just causes me to wake up, smile, and push forward. If I didn't know Eights during these times, I don't think I ever would have healed.

  7. #7
    Blood of the Exile Animal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Newbyagain View Post
    That is exactly why both times I have been like this in my life, when I'm around Eights it's like somehow your energy just causes me to wake up, smile, and push forward. If I didn't know Eights during these times, I don't think I ever would have healed.
    Aw! That is sweet =)

    I had a hard time with my 'enneagram journey' - I went through a few other numbers before accepting 8 although it was staring me in the face the whole time... it's very hard for me to face some of these things in myself, but oddly enough enneagram has been helping me grow & really see myself lately; something I didn't expect, I got into it because I'm writing a book & wanted to understand my characters ! Anyway it's been hard but stuff like this makes me smile and feel better about being an 8. =,)
    Art is the blood of the Exile
    4w3 6w7 8w9 ~ Sx/Sp ~ ISTP ~ LSI-Se

  8. #8
    Senior Member madhatter's Avatar
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    I rarely experience guilt. If I do, I'll decide if the guilt is warranted. If not, I forget it, and move on. If it is, I'll address the reason for that guilt. If I treated someone badly and feel guilty, I'll apologize and make amends. If no direct solution presents itself, I will make sure never to repeat that action in the future.

    Like Maybe said, there's no point to this: (Yep, I did that just because I love that emoticon.)

  9. #9
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I've pretty much had to shut off guilt in order to be able to function at all.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  10. #10
    Member PrettyWoman's Avatar
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    I think guilt rarely really gets me, somehow I tend to laugh or smile potential sources of guilt away. And I'd rather not dwell on things like that, I just look for somewhere else Life is not to be taken too seriously. At least mine isn't
    Johari Nohari

    Alignment: Chaotic Good
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    MOTIV: Offbeat
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    Multiple intelligences: Linguistic > Mathematical > Kinesthetic...
    My Little Pony: Rainbow Dash
    Oldham style: Mercurial > Idiosyncratic...
    R-Drive: Dynamism > Vitality > Hedonism...
    Temperaments: Sanguine
    Trifix: 7w6, 2w3, 8w7
    VisualDNA: Seeker

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