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  1. #21
    royal member Rasofy's Avatar
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    Worked fine for me.

    Neutral child vs. Responsive parent
    This scenario is thought to produce Enneagram type 5

    In this relationship, the Responsive parent is inclined to give a lot of unrequested attention to the Neutral child, who perceives his parent's supportive and affectionate attitude as a form of smothering. The youngster will tend to withdraw from his environment, preferring solitary activities and contemplation, but as opposed to the previous scenario (of type 9), loneliness will not be accompanied by a feeling of rejection. At the contrary, being alone is a matter of choice and it gives a feeling of security and well-being, knowing that there is always someone to communicate with when they decide to seek out company.

    Such children are genuine loners, who prefer and enjoy their solitude. They are introspective, insightful and love learning and discovering things on their own, usually rejecting any help or intervention from the outside. They are afraid of being intruded upon because their parents used to make a fuss over them and suffocate them with attention and demands for closeness.
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    A man builds. A parasite asks 'Where is my share?'
    A man creates. A parasite says, 'What will the neighbors think?'
    A man invents. A parasite says, 'Watch out, or you might tread on the toes of God... '


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  2. #22
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    I was mostly a neutral child with a responsive mom and a neutral dad. So that would make me either a 3 or a 5.
    INtp
    5w6 or 9w1 sp/so/sx, I think
    Ravenclaw/Hufflepuff
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  3. #23
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    My parents were inconsistent, but overall it's probably somewhere between neutral and active for them, leaning towards neutral more. From other accounts, I wasn't exactly consistent either, but I'd say neutral for the most part. Based on this...

    Neutral child vs. Neutral parent
    This scenario is thought to produce Enneagram type 3

    This Neutral child's solitude is encouraged by his parent's own withdrawal and indifference, which doesn’t necessarily make the Neutral child feel openly rejected, but rather intrigues and challenges him. Serious, focused and rather unemotional, this youngster will most likely try to fulfill his occasional need for attention by impressing his parents with outstanding accomplishments and high aspirations, which make him feel worthy and valuable in their eyes.

    Later in life, these children become motivated achievers who put great emphasis on results, performance, efficiency and a successful image that will make others appreciate and admire them. Deep inside they dislike being ignored because it makes them doubt their own value, therefore they tend to hide their weaknesses and flaws and project a desirable, attractive, "I-have-it-all" persona.
    Hmm...maybe I need to reconsider my type. Or maybe I can account for wing theory here.

  4. #24
    garbage
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    Definitely neutral/neutral for me--the parents and I pretty much stayed out of each others' way while my more troublesome siblings got the attention. But it didn't come across as 'intriguing or challenging.'

  5. #25
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    Interesting...I am an 8, and was thinking that my son was also becoming an 8, but now I'm thinking perhaps a 4. He does seem to resort to very dramatic emotions to get what he wants. When he was smaller, I vacillated between being a responsive parent to being unresponsive. He sometimes still has to yell "mom" three or four times to get my attention if I'm immersed in something. He's 6y/o, so it's still a little early to see all of his development.

    Both of my parents were very authoritarian - obedience was very important. I wasn't very good at being obedient, especially, "just because [they] said so." And voila, you have me! The interesting thing is that I have 7 siblings, none of which are 8's...which means I was the only active child? Or maybe my parents played different active/neutral/responsive roles to each child?

  6. #26
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    I would say my mom is responsive and my dad neutral, and myself responsive. My mom has been my primary caretaker, so we fulfill the enneagram roles.

    Responsive child vs. Neutral parent
    This scenario is thought to produce Enneagram type 2

    Responsive child vs. Responsive parent
    This scenario is thought to produce Enneagram type 6

  7. #27
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    Hmm my mom is responsive and my grandmother was responsive and Im responsive with a little active, so 6w7 probably does make sense.

    However my grandfather wavered between extremes of active and neutral, and was actually my most consistent parent. Probably he was a 5 with 8 in his triad. I also have 8 in my triad.

    And I have 4 in my triad as well.

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