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  1. #1
    Senior Member Vizzy's Avatar
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    Default My deepest desires? Instinct Variants

    I've been trying to figure out my instinct variant and am pretty sure that self-preservation is in it.
    Often, it's as if I don't need people in my life. I'd be happy spending weeks alone researching and reading about the topics I'm interested in, or making the library my home.

    About instinct variants, does it have more to do with how you act or what you REALLY want deep down? I ask that because I'm a contradiction. For someone who's so fascinated with self-discovery, I can be such a puzzle to myself.

    Sp is probably first, although I wouldn't discount the possibility that it may be second.
    The sexual and social variants are the ones I have trouble with.

    Regarding the social variant:

    I don't care too much about my status or position in society. I was never bothered with popularity nor felt threatened by peer pressure. Feeling superior in a group is something I definitely don't aim for. Clubs/groups/the elite - none of those really interest me, let alone the desire to rise in rank.

    Regarding the sexual variant:

    I fantasize about a close/romantic relationship but am at the same time afraid of such intimacy with another person. I'm nice and friendly with everyone but even my friends/acquaintances have pointed out that it's as if I walk around with a "Don't come too close" sign. It's a contradiction I don't understand. How can a person want a close bond with someone but convince herself to kill the idea as if it's disgusting or hopeless?

    What are my instinct variants? Feel free to ask me questions. If it helps, I'm a 5w4 and possibly an INTP.
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  2. #2
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vizzy View Post
    I've been trying to figure out my instinct variant and am pretty sure that self-preservation is in it.
    Often, it's as if I don't need people in my life. I'd be happy spending weeks alone researching and reading about the topics I'm interested in, or making the library my home.

    About instinct variants, does it have more to do with how you act or what you REALLY want deep down? I ask that because I'm a contradiction. For someone who's so fascinated with self-discovery, I can be such a puzzle to myself.

    Sp is probably first, although I wouldn't discount the possibility that it may be second.
    The sexual and social variants are the ones I have trouble with.

    Regarding the social variant:

    I don't care too much about my status or position in society. I was never bothered with popularity nor felt threatened by peer pressure. Feeling superior in a group is something I definitely don't aim for. Clubs/groups/the elite - none of those really interest me, let alone the desire to rise in rank.

    Regarding the sexual variant:

    I fantasize about a close/romantic relationship but am at the same time afraid of such intimacy with another person. I'm nice and friendly with everyone but even my friends/acquaintances have pointed out that it's as if I walk around with a "Don't come too close" sign. It's a contradiction I don't understand. How can a person want a close bond with someone but convince herself to kill the idea as if it's disgusting or hopeless?
    What are my instinct variants? Feel free to ask me questions. If it helps, I'm a 5w4 and possibly an INTP.
    you sound Sp/Sx as hell. welcome to the club
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
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    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  3. #3
    Senior Member VagrantFarce's Avatar
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    You don't have to display social behavior to have a dominant social instinct, or alluring behavior to have a dominant sexual instinct, or actively seek health/comfort to have a dominant self-preservation instinct. The instincts are subconscious radars - they skew your attention in a certain direction.

    For example, take someone who sees themselves primarily as "anti-social", or otherwise separate from "the group" - they might not consciously think of themselves as having a social instinct, but they're still orienting via the social instinct subconsciously. While they don't see themselves as social, they're still orientating to the world in a social manner - their place in the world is defined by their orientation (or lack thereof) to the group.

    This is the trick to it - examine yourself, look at the decisions you've made, and try to spot the patterns. This will help you to notice how your subconscious influences your decisions and behavior, and ultimately help you identify how you are addressing (or not addressing) your needs.
    Hello

  4. #4
    Senior Member Vizzy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    you sound Sp/Sx as hell. welcome to the club
    Damn, really?? I guess the 'sex' in 'sexual variant' freaked me out.
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  5. #5
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vizzy View Post
    Damn, really?? I guess the 'sex' in 'sexual variant' freaked me out.
    the sexual instinct is about intimacy, merging, intensity and forming strong bonds with people/things.
    ENFP: We put the Fi in Fire
    ENFP
    5w4>1w9>2w1 Sx/Sp
    SEE-Fi
    Papa Bear
    Motivation: Dark Worker
    Alignment: Chaotic Neutral
    Chibi Seme
    MTG Color: black/red
    Male Archtype: King/Lover
    Sunburst!
    "You are a gay version of Gambit" Speed Gavroche
    "I wish that I could be affected by any hate, but I can't, cuz I just get affected by the bank" Chamillionaire

  6. #6
    Senior Member Vizzy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by VagrantFarce View Post
    You don't have to display social behavior to have a dominant social instinct, or alluring behavior to have a dominant sexual instinct, or actively seek health/comfort to have a dominant self-preservation instinct. The instincts are subconscious radars - they skew your attention in a certain direction.
    For example, take someone who sees themselves primarily as "anti-social", or otherwise separate from "the group" - they might not consciously think of themselves as having a social instinct, but they're still orienting via the social instinct subconsciously. While they don't see themselves as social, they're still orientating to the world in a social manner - their place in the world is defined by their orientation (or lack thereof) to the group.

    This is the trick to it - examine yourself, look at the decisions you've made, and try to spot the patterns. This will help you to notice how your subconscious influences your decisions and behavior, and ultimately help you identify how you are addressing (or not addressing) your needs.
    The first few lines. That's an important point that needs to be pointed out more in instinct variant discussions.
    In that case, the social instinct resonates less with me. Fitting in or trying hard to be different is not something that I make any effort to do. I'm aware of my oddness, but it's not something I publicize, revel in, or dis/encourage.
    On the other hand, intimacy and close relationships is an area that I can honestly say I worry and wrack my brain about (though I never act on it...and usually deny myself).
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  7. #7
    Senior Member Vizzy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    the sexual instinct is about intimacy, merging, intensity and forming strong bonds with people/things.
    Yeah, I was kidding (well, half-) about the 'sex'. Regarding all those things you just mentioned, that's why I initially thought the sexual instinct related to me least. Intimacy, merging, strong bonds with people?? Ugh. (There I go again, putting on that stupid front, pretending I don't want anything to do with getting close to a person.) @VagrantFarce raised a good point about how the instinct also shows its power when we feel strongly against it.
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  8. #8
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    Instincts variant are not really about "deepest desire". "desire" come from the heart, while instincts are, by definition, instinctive and come from the guts. It's a current mistake, for example, many people think they are Sexual, while they are simply emo.
    EsTP 6w7 Sx/Sp

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    E=60% S=55% T=70% P=80%

    "I don't believe in guilt, I only believe in living on impulses"

    "Stereotypes about personality and gender turn out to be fairly accurate: ... On the binary Myers-Briggs measure, the thinking-feeling breakdown is about 30/70 for women versus 60/40 for men." ~ Bryan Caplan

  9. #9
    Senior Member Silveresque's Avatar
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    I'm gonna go with @Elfboy on this. You seem Sp/Sx to me. If you don't desire to fit in to the group, chances are you're So last. And you mentioned being conflicted by your desire for intimacy--that's common for fives with the Sx instinct from what I've heard. But I think it's also possible that you could be Sx/Sp, so I would look up the two variants and see which one seems to be the better fit.

  10. #10
    Whisky Old & Women Young Speed Gavroche's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Elfboy View Post
    the sexual instinct is about intimacy, merging, intensity and forming strong bonds with people/things.
    Yes, but for sex, not to drink tea and discuss buisness and philosophy.
    EsTP 6w7 Sx/Sp

    Chaotic Neutral

    E=60% S=55% T=70% P=80%

    "I don't believe in guilt, I only believe in living on impulses"

    "Stereotypes about personality and gender turn out to be fairly accurate: ... On the binary Myers-Briggs measure, the thinking-feeling breakdown is about 30/70 for women versus 60/40 for men." ~ Bryan Caplan

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