AA - Part Douche

[ferunandesu]

I believe that I started a similar thread a year or so ago. Now the particulars have changed, yet the general principle still stands...

I moved in with a new roommate, a fellow INTP, a 5 year friend. He constantly reminds me of the extent of my arrogant, asshole - douchebaggery. However, in this case, it's okay since he's just as bad and completely understands what it means to be an asshole and what it means to call me an asshole.

Now I have to ask the question: are you an asshole? Why do others consider you an asshole? Why do you consider yourself an asshole.

-- thanks, now fuck off

ferunandesu

[spirilis]

I come off as aloof, unapproachable, and sometimes a general asshole. A former boss hated that (he seemed to be INFJ). It was a personal crusade of his to "break peoples attitudes", namely his employees (IT workers, a mixed bag of personalities but the 'arrogant techie' was his gripe). I was one of his little projects.

In the end, I never fully understood what he was getting at, but now I do. I'd say I didn't really understand it until I'd studied MBTI for a year or two.

I try to do the right thing and be a person of good, but I'm not going to whimper if I step on some toes. Maybe apologize if I'm feeling up to it

[Quiesce]

People frequently think I an asshole because I can seem like an uncaring, thoughtless, anal-retentive control freak.


I agree because I -am-

[cafe]

The only person who has flat-out called me that to my face was my mom. She wanted me to give her money and I finally said no.

If others think it and haven't said it to me or to someone who would get it back to me, that's just fine. People have a right to their private thoughts.

[HanoverFist]

Whether I'm an asshole or not, depends on who you are. The ones that think I'm an asshole are the ones trying to screw with my world. I don't consider myself an asshole, but I can be a really good asshole when I want to.

[heart]

Originally Posted by spirilis

I come off as aloof, unapproachable, and sometimes a general asshole. A former boss hated that (he seemed to be INFJ). It was a personal crusade of his to "break peoples attitudes", namely his employees (IT workers, a mixed bag of personalities but the 'arrogant techie' was his gripe). I was one of his little projects.

Oh gosh, I have had managers like this. They were doomed to frustration.

I think most people who are not in my private life would describe me as cold and aloof. I have been called cold to my face so I know this is something people have thought. I try not to step on people's toes but I won't give to others too much if they want me to conform to their way or want me to give of my own time or effort in a social way at work. I am just not interested in having a "relationship" with people that I have a casual aquaintanceship with. Some people cannot understand that.

I also know that people have thought I was arrogant. I know I come accross that way, but I have a lot of opinions that I am very firm on. I spend much time going over my beliefs and opinions in my own mind and reviewing them when I get new info and revising them but publicly I tend to keep an opinion private until I feel I have gelled it well and by then I usually tend to be rather firm on it.

[Natrushka]

I am an INTJ, of course people think I'm an ass. Unfortunately, it is usually more of a problem with people closest to me because I make the mistake of thinking I can be honest with them. It used to be more of a problem than it is now, age has had a positive impact. I'm more careful about what I say.

<sigh>

[Oberon]

Some guys try to pick up girls and get called an asshole; this never happened to Pablo Picasso. He would walk down the street, girls could not resist his stare...Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole.

[cue instrumental]

[Jennifer]

Originally Posted by Oberon67

Some guys try to pick up girls and get called an asshole; this never happened to Pablo Picasso. He would walk down the street, girls could not resist his stare...Pablo Picasso was never called an asshole. [cue instrumental]

Nice dodge!

I don't remember getting called an a-hole, mostly because I avoid open conflict and abrasiveness.

(I suppose if I ever did earn the title, it would be for my passive-aggressive streak, or for not being willing to let go on a particular distinction in an argument, or for taking a joke too far...)

[Oberon]

Originally Posted by Jennifer

I don't remember getting called an a-hole, mostly because I avoid open conflict and abrasiveness.

I remember it happening to you, though in truth you may not have been present at the time. =]