Your dreams ain't that f*&%'n hard to achieve! Creative dreams I'm talking about, writing a book, a poem, dancing salsa, painting a picture, making a movie. They're not hard because people are doing them all over the world, all the time. Richard Linklater acknowledged in a recent interview I saw that even a small low budget movie is likely a huge personal challenge for the people involved. It is! I say this mostly for myself, because I need motivation. I let the whole of last year go by producing barely anything! I started out with such good intentions and how in hell did I let that slip by, a whole year! South Park is made in 6 days, and they do most of that in the last 24 hours! Last year passed me by! 365 days… I was busy, things seemed too insurmountable, I needed this first, I needed that then so much time went by and well if I hadn't done it by now what am I going to achieve with what's left? A lot, that's what, only I didn't. Fear was lurking, in the shadows, in the ink of my pen, in the lens of my camera, fear was the weight on my eyelids and in between the beats of my heart. Was the voice, laughing at whatever pitiful thing I dared to have the audacity to even think of, oh nice paragraph, nice page but you won't go back to it and actually DO anything with this work, it will fester and by the time you look at it again it will be riddled with so much doubt that you'll go back to watching and reading the work of others, with thoughts of being able to do better. What a joke. So I begin again, and this time that little poison weasel is is going to be crawling around in the depths of a pit while I stand on the top of a mountain with the gods of olympus. Nine days until the end of the month, how hard can it be to make a 2 minute short? I hear that wiry shadow remind me that in german nein is the sound for no. The way to get out of the quicksand is not to fight it, that only takes you under, you relax and give yourself over and with sand and dirt caked all over you, you can be proud that you beat death by being ready to let him win.