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  1. #1
    The Duchess of Oddity Queen Kat's Avatar
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    Default Kat needs a pompous pseudonym

    As some of you might now, I'm trying to write a book and get it published one day. But there is one problem: my name. I have a unpronounceable and unspellable hookername and I don't think many people would like to read a book from an Eastern European hooker, now would they? Anyways, I have already chosen a last name to use when I want to publish my stuff, and now all I want is a first name for my pseudonym. The things I demand for my pseudonym's first name:
    • It should be masculine. Men sell more books than women and win more prizes, because people think they have a penis. So it would be a good thing if my pseudonym can make people think I have a penis.
    • It should be pompous. Why? Because pompous names are funny enough to remember. Plus it makes the pseudonym more obviously an pseudonym.
    • It should not be too American. I'm from the Netherlands and having a pompous American name is too pompous. I also don't want a too Dutch name, because I'd like to go global. So no Ephraim Horatio or IJsbrand Gijsbrecht (too bad I like IJsbrand).
    • Evil sounding is a pro. And no, I'm not talking about Adolf, Castro or Lucifer, because that's too much evilness at the same time. It's okay if it's the name of a cartoon villain's pet. After all, I was named after my mother who was named after a cartoon, so I was named after a cartoon as well.
    • It shouldn't start with a K.
    I was sitting outside the classroom waiting to go in, and I saw an airplane hit the tower. The TV was obviously on. I used to fly myself and I said, "There's one terrible pilot."
    - George W. Bush -


    SCUAI - 7w8 sx/sp - Chaotic Evil - Fucking Cute - ALIVE

    Blog. Read it, bitches.
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    If you don't agree about my MBTI type, you can complain about it here. I've had plenty of people telling me I'm something else, in my reputation box. That's annoying.

  2. #2
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    Default

    Landon P. Dwyer.



  3. #3
    The Duchess of Oddity Queen Kat's Avatar
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    Default

    I've already chosen a last name, thnx.
    I was sitting outside the classroom waiting to go in, and I saw an airplane hit the tower. The TV was obviously on. I used to fly myself and I said, "There's one terrible pilot."
    - George W. Bush -


    SCUAI - 7w8 sx/sp - Chaotic Evil - Fucking Cute - ALIVE

    Blog. Read it, bitches.
    Questions? Click here
    If you don't agree about my MBTI type, you can complain about it here. I've had plenty of people telling me I'm something else, in my reputation box. That's annoying.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Shimmy's Avatar
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    I would pick an international sounding name. It sounds a bit ambitious, but if your book ever get's translated it may be an advantage if people can pronounce your name.

    The most masculine international name I can think of: Dick.
    (removed)

  5. #5
    meinmeinmein! mmhmm's Avatar
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    Alex Pitney Carrington
    every normal man must be tempted, at times,
    to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag,
    and begin slitting throats.
    h.l. mencken

  6. #6
    Senior Member Jaguar's Avatar
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    I don't know how "pompous" they are, but I thought of these:

    Maximilian
    Maxwell
    Zachary
    Kristoff
    Alexander
    Carson
    Gabriel
    Winston
    Bennett
    Harrison
    Nathaniel
    Grant
    Victor
    Vincent
    Graham
    Griffin
    Zaine

  7. #7
    The Duchess of Oddity Queen Kat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shimmy View Post
    I would pick an international sounding name. It sounds a bit ambitious, but if your book ever get's translated it may be an advantage if people can pronounce your name.

    The most masculine international name I can think of: Dick.
    Dick's a good one! Anyways, that's exactly what I meant with not-American and not-Dutch: INTERNATIONAL. Most names here are sooooo American. I'm Dutch and names that end with -ton and -son and -ney are too American. The names I had in mind at the moment were Dionysus (because it means "drunk"), Attila (because it's funny) and Azrael (after Gargamel's cat in the Smurfs).

    I know I'm way too ambitious... but that doesn't mean I shouldn't give it a try? After all, I'm so bad I'm good.
    I was sitting outside the classroom waiting to go in, and I saw an airplane hit the tower. The TV was obviously on. I used to fly myself and I said, "There's one terrible pilot."
    - George W. Bush -


    SCUAI - 7w8 sx/sp - Chaotic Evil - Fucking Cute - ALIVE

    Blog. Read it, bitches.
    Questions? Click here
    If you don't agree about my MBTI type, you can complain about it here. I've had plenty of people telling me I'm something else, in my reputation box. That's annoying.

  8. #8
    meinmeinmein! mmhmm's Avatar
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    Stirling Converse
    Gavin Jethroe
    Roman Sturgis Brooks
    William Caldicott
    Endicott Crowninshield
    Ezekiel "Zeke' Ward Gerrit Graham
    Kermit Quentin Burroughs
    James Phinney Whitlock
    Baxter Hiram Bingham
    Edgar Phillip Rice Chafee
    Otis William Sloane
    every normal man must be tempted, at times,
    to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag,
    and begin slitting throats.
    h.l. mencken

  9. #9
    meinmeinmein! mmhmm's Avatar
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    Alonzo Evans
    Charles Walker Fince
    Hollis Franchot
    Bartlett Theodore Gunn
    Clay Robert Wendell
    Gregory Ayres Lish
    Vance Mendenhall Mesereau
    every normal man must be tempted, at times,
    to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag,
    and begin slitting throats.
    h.l. mencken

  10. #10
    Senior Member chachamaru's Avatar
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    Default

    Katherine. Katrina. Katrine. Karina.

    Katherine is best... like Katherine the great.
    a cat is fine too

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