User Tag List

123 Last

Results 1 to 10 of 24

Thread: Poem Thread

  1. #1
    *ears perk up* wolfmaiden14's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    Infx
    Posts
    590

    Default Poem Thread

    Hello hello everyone. It just occurred to me today that most forums I'm a member of usually have a poetry forum and an art forum, but this is the closest I've found to somewhere to share our own works of art. (Feel free to move it if there's a more appropriate one) So.. this is a poem thread! Feel free to share anything you've written for feedback or works in progress for criticism. I also thought it would be neat to see if/how type influences subject matter and/or style.

    The only thing I'll ask is that you only post one poem of yours at a time(meaning.. at least one or two poems from someone else before you post another of yours), so people don't get too bogged down, and can give each one a fair amount of attention.


    I'll kick things off with one of my simpler poems about my kitty.

    My Little Buddy

    My little buddy,
    my baby boy,
    you cuddle me at night,
    with your silver-black tabby blanket
    draped over my forehead
    In fact, anytime I lay my head near you,
    your furry white paw lifts to rest on it,
    guarding me with the regal, content look of a lion
    You rub my leg encouragingly when I cry
    a gentle reminder
    you always make me happy, Mommy
    You keep me company, my little roommate
    I'm never alone

    Your curious golden eyes
    patiently stare while I eat anything
    Sitting nice,
    until I finally share a tiny tid-bit,
    but you never try it anyway
    unless it's to steal a lick off the plate when I'm not looking
    You curl up on top of my books and papers
    Every. Damn. Time. I try to get work done
    You non-chalantly doze as if you aren't really jealous,
    or demanding my attention with your puffy chipmunk cheeks
    and I stop and pet you and smile
    no matter what I was doing or thinking about
    The best times were when we'd both fall asleep
    on top of my algebra homework

    You make me laugh
    As you chitter "mau-mrow-ma-mraou!"
    to the gnats swarming outside the window,
    and when you flop your roly-poly body over
    and mew at me to rub your belly with my foot,
    only to snap-dragon shut and attack my sock,
    and when I hear your imploring death cries,
    but really you just left the room and don't know where I am,
    so I flick my tongue against my palette
    forming locust-like clicks my father taught me for squirrels
    and a brush of foot pads against carpet tells me
    you've heard your mama's call

    I kiss your wet pink nose
    and rub your face, tracing the black stripes extending from your eyes
    Then I pick you up and hold you close
    and scritch between your ears
    As you rest your arms around my neck
    and purr against my touch
    I wonder,
    my little Whisper,
    who's really taking care of who
    Forming characters! Whose? Our own or others? Both. And in that momentous fact lies the peril and responsibility of our existence. - Elihu Burritt

    Member of the Maverick's Biker Club - Now crashing through walls instead of just..walking into them.

  2. #2
    Oberon
    Guest

    Default

    Little Buddy's Response

    You are warm
    You feed me
    You amuse me
    Life is good

    still

    Things would be
    different around here
    if I had
    opposable thumbs

  3. #3
    *ears perk up* wolfmaiden14's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    Infx
    Posts
    590

    Default

    Response to Little Buddy's Response

    You're so silly
    You want opposable thumbs
    but I'm sure you would only use them
    to turn on the shower for water
    and end up drenching yourself

    There is a reason you have not
    climbed the evolutionary tree

    Be careful what you wish for.
    Forming characters! Whose? Our own or others? Both. And in that momentous fact lies the peril and responsibility of our existence. - Elihu Burritt

    Member of the Maverick's Biker Club - Now crashing through walls instead of just..walking into them.

  4. #4
    Oberon
    Guest

    Default

    Little Buddy's Response #2

    I would so
    turn on the shower for
    water and drench
    myself

    that's what you do
    Last edited by Oberon; 12-07-2007 at 03:24 PM. Reason: Second stanza was not ready for prime time.

  5. #5
    Member whatnot's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    xNfj
    Posts
    39

    Default

    Ooo! A poetry thread!


    The City

    in a squint, it all looked like the
    45 minute drive into the city
    through a yellow night,
    where the traffic and the attitudes and
    the push and pull
    of parallel parking and walking
    at least 6 blocks to anywhere
    were always so good.

    the city was tall and everything lived
    either overhead or underground, but
    i walked somewhere in between
    because my hands were too clean
    to stay. i miss the dirty hands
    and hunched step and grit
    and teeth and city bite. now there
    is no one there anymore but people:
    great rushing crowds of them, and
    they were beautiful in a lonely way.
    it was a comfortable pressure,
    like a warm, screaming womb,
    and the smoke always sang me to sleep.

    tonight, i will listen
    to country clouds in a house
    with a yard and a porch and
    no strangers anymore. it is
    a sweet and easy place, but
    the quiet plays too brightly for me.
    i will squint again and hope for dreams
    of the dark, where everything is
    taller and louder and so much
    less than any of this.

  6. #6
    *ears perk up* wolfmaiden14's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    Infx
    Posts
    590

    Default

    Response to Little Buddy #2

    But I thought you didn't like
    getting wet.
    Maybe I'll just have
    to splash you next time.

    HaHaHa..
    I can just see your fuzzy fur
    after getting all static-y

    You should make yourself useful
    and go chase that mouse.

    ~~~

    Whatnot, I really like the comparison in the poem! The imagery really fits the scenes. I also love the auditory characteristics you gave the smoke and the clouds. Both wispy things, which were personified, and also contrast the white purity and the Grey grungyness of the two places. I really get a sense of "lostness" because the narrator's hands are "too clean" for the city, but needs more than the country.
    Forming characters! Whose? Our own or others? Both. And in that momentous fact lies the peril and responsibility of our existence. - Elihu Burritt

    Member of the Maverick's Biker Club - Now crashing through walls instead of just..walking into them.

  7. #7
    Member whatnot's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    xNfj
    Posts
    39

    Default

    Thanks! I wrote that after I moved from a large city, which I absolutely adored, back to my hometown, which is much smaller.

  8. #8
    Senior Member htb's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2007
    MBTI
    INTJ
    Enneagram
    1w9
    Posts
    1,506

    Default

    A little wren flew round and round
    Milky vanes, lutescent down
    It settled on my windowsill
    So I bashed its goddamned head in.

  9. #9
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    MBTI
    eNFJ
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx/so
    Socionics
    eNFJ Ni
    Posts
    11,443

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by wolfmaiden14 View Post
    Response to Little Buddy's Response

    You're so silly
    You want opposable thumbs
    but I'm sure you would only use them
    to turn on the shower for water
    and end up drenching yourself

    There is a reason you have not
    climbed the evolutionary tree

    Be careful what you wish for.
    Quote Originally Posted by oberon View Post
    Little Buddy's Response #2

    I would so
    turn on the shower for
    water and drench
    myself

    that's what you do

    LOL!! You two.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
    Neutral Good
    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  10. #10
    *ears perk up* wolfmaiden14's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    MBTI
    Infx
    Posts
    590

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by htb View Post
    A little wren flew round and round
    Milky vanes, lutescent down
    It settled on my windowsill
    So I bashed its goddamned head in.
    I want another stanza about the gore.

    It reminds me somewhat of a message my friend left me one time

    Rachel, Rachel, wherefor art thou, Rachel?
    You are as the stars
    And I am as the moon
    They are so distanced.

    Though it is rare that they speak
    Though it is rare that they feel
    one another's warm embrace,

    At least the stars pick up their god-damned phone!


    I was listening to this at 7am driving to work and almost crashed the car from laughing.
    Forming characters! Whose? Our own or others? Both. And in that momentous fact lies the peril and responsibility of our existence. - Elihu Burritt

    Member of the Maverick's Biker Club - Now crashing through walls instead of just..walking into them.

Similar Threads

  1. Introductory threads encouraged!
    By SolitaryWalker in forum Welcomes and Introductions
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 05-01-2007, 11:26 AM
  2. Geoff makes obligatory welcome thread
    By Geoff in forum Welcomes and Introductions
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 04-25-2007, 11:59 AM
  3. a Poem
    By disregard in forum Arts & Entertainment
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 04-25-2007, 05:19 AM
  4. The Hundredth Thread
    By Rajah in forum The Bonfire
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-24-2007, 12:22 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO