Stan: Look, my friend Kyle won't fly back home to Colorado, all I need you to do is just talk to him and tell him you know the whole talking to dead people thing isn't for real.
John Edward: Maybe it is for real.
Stan: Right, but it's not. It's a trick you do and I need you to just let my friend Kyle know that so he can go on with his life.
John Edward: Look, people have the right to be skeptical. I really hear voices in my head.
Stan: Yes, we all hear voices in our heads, it's called intuition. Get over yourself and tell my friend it's just for fun.
John Edward: Look, what I do doesn't hurt anybody. I give people closure and help them cope with life.
Stan: No, you give them false hope and a belief in something that isn't real.
John Edward: But I'm a psychic.
Stan: No dude, you're a douche.
John Edward: I'm not a douche. What if I really believe dead people talk to me?
Stan: Then you're a stupid douche.