There are so many solutions, where to start?
Two branches of exploration:
What are you doing to address your agoraphobia?
AND
What skills do you currently have?
Hi, PeaceBaby,
First of all, I would love to state that I have made peace with, even
embraced, this "phobia." I see this trait as indicative of my body trying to tell me what does and doesn't align with who I am. It's a personal quirk that is deeply ingrained in my DNA; I don't view it as imperative that I be forced to lead a lifestyle which is so diametrically opposed to my individuality - that is, the "rat race" that dictates a 9-to-5 workday, driving long distances through hellish traffic, and then sitting still for hours under fluorescent lighting.
Believe it or not, I am absolutely okay with who I am, and am very focused in regards to my priorities. However, (getting a little Randian here) I am very much aware of the fact that I'm not entitled to lead a life that the rest of society approves of or even understands. Back in the olden days, they used to put people like me in the monasteries and call it even. Not so, in the 21st century. At the age of 24 (soon to be 25 in a little over a week), I have devoted virtually my entire adult life to supporting a normal existence for myself. Which, considering my background (homeschooled, then enrolled in an academically insignificant, highly fundamentalist Christian high school), hasn't exactly been a cakewalk. Since ~18 or 19, and even before then if you count babysitting, I've worked pretty much any job I could get: washing dishes, retail environments, helping disabled kids, senior care, leading walking tours on a seasonal basis, and now, working as an office assistant and receptionist for a little museum. I've done some fine art modeling (taking a hiatus because shit got weird), done freelance writing for a magazine, but it didn't pay much and wasn't steady work. The new editor blew me off; my writing has been described as not being succinct enough, and, by the former editor, "almost Victorian." I've got an Associate's degree, and went back to school last year; I expect to graduate with my BA in the Fall.
Agoraphobics desperately want to be contributing members of society. However, we have issues with executive functioning and being forced to be at a very specific, often faraway location at a very specific time. We need jobs that either allow us to work remotely or that have flexible hours — basically, you need to work a certain number of hours per week but it is up to you at what times you do the work. After my studies are complete, I am going to try to find work either with one of the state parks where I live, or try to be a historical reenactor or guide in said park(s). Something tourist-y or having to do with work outdoors... I'm a true outdoorswoman. Unfortunately, the Renn Faires in this area are strictly seasonal. Many of the writing jobs I've stumbled across online have been scams, as I've said. I have heavily considered self-employment - intuitive counseling could be done out in a public place or in the client's home. I've volunteered with faerie festivals and the like, and have thought about approaching said festivals to either be a craft vendor or musician, but am realistic about the fact that this will not be my chief income but something I do on the side. With my music, the goal this summer is to get my band going and hire another musician besides just myself. I don't know. I try to do my art, but then I get depressed because I am always having to do my "day job" to simply afford car insurance, gasoline, food/water, and the dreaded car loan. The muses depart from me, and god only knows where they go... Waffle House wants me. I want to try and pick up a second job this summer, but I'll be darned if it's Waffle House!!!! Still, it was nice to be approached and offered a job there on the spot, without my having even asked if they were hiring...
In my academic life, I have always had strong research and writing skills. I've written 17-page papers on Japanese theatre; I've dissected Moliere and Ibsen. My grades have often suffered due to "lack of participation," which is code for: not speaking up enough in class, and tardiness (you remember that kid who always showed up two minutes late to class?...yeah, that'd be me). Last semester I achieved a 3.7 GPA; this semester I'll be lucky if I manage a 3.5 due to being stretched thin with both a play and an opera, and professors being largely unsympathetic to this, and my double burden of having a job. Academia sucks. My approach to my studies is to just... "git 'er done." I should've picked History instead of majoring in Theatre; I've had to ask off of work to attend a couple rehearsals now, which were held on the weekends and created an inconvenience...whereas, it was a normal occurrence at the community college I attended for students to work, but very few students at this institution hold down jobs. If they do, it's at the college library for a couple hours a week or some shit. You're assumed to be nothing more than a student. You are expected to lay your sanity on the line for these productions. I'm not having it. After my college "education" is through, I will not have anything further to do with theatre, I don't think... That seemed like a good direction to head in for an eccentric like me, but it's a very yuppie line of work, oddly enough. I always loved horror films/ film noir, thrillers, et cetera, and would have liked to act in such films. Now, I'm realizing with each passing year how much of a pipe dream that really is.
So, those are my skills and my personal philosophy, in a nutshell.
