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Who on this forum has been in a fraternity? What type of fraternity?

xisnotx

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in my junior year, i could've probably joined a frat named "farmhouse". i kept on getting invites for their events...even had dinner there a couple times. they were asking me if i was going to join and i was like "maybe" but really i was just there for the free food.
 

Ivy

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I remembered that I joined a few honor societies with greek names, but they weren't exactly fraternities or sororities. And I don't think we actually did anything together. It was more of a resume builder.

Also, there was a co-ed frat that I spent some time at. It was called St. Anthony's, but it was a chapter of Delta Psi. Very different from the rest of the Greek organizations on campus and I would definitely have considered joining.
 

skylights

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@AffirmitiveAnxiety

Did you have to do any hazing? < you don't have to go into details if you don't want.

Yes, I was hazed a little, and I hazed a little. It was never forced.



Did it feel like a cult?

Lol, not at all. If anything, because I got into leadership, it felt more like a government sometimes, or an events committee. Lots of planning and responsibilities. It was never particularly forced. The most "cult-y" thing I suppose is our Initiation ceremony, which we have special outfits for and during which we sing songs written in the 1800s with lots of references from a number of historical sources, including ancient Greek and Roman learning and the Bible. There are no religious beliefs required, however. The only thing close to a tenet focuses on scholarship, seeing as fraternal organizations are first and foremost academic subgroups.

Were you just lucky in the people you met, or would you recommend houses of that nature to anyone?

I would recommend talking to the people in the group and getting a feel of the culture of the group. It really varies by chapter though, so you can't even go by individual sorority or fraternity. I do think I got lucky, but I also think my choice of school had a lot to do with it. I went to a smaller, artsy school, and the Greek life there reflected that. I have met girls in my sorority from other schools and heard them talk about their experiences, and I think that at a number of their schools, I would never have joined. My advice to anyone would be to join if you enjoy organized socialization and if you find a group that makes you feel comfortable, welcomed, and worthwhile.

What were the negatives? What were the positives, beyond what you've already mentioned?

The biggest negative was probably the amount of time it took in my life, but that's kind of both a pro and a con. I got really into sorority leadership, and I could have been doing more academically (I still did research, Honors, and studied abroad - not like it ate my entire life). I would just advise anyone interested to understand that it's a large time commitment, and there are responsibilities - though some people get less involved and stay on the fringe as much as possible, and that minimizes the time constraints. Also, there was a lot of drama. This is true in frats, too. Whenever you associate that closely with a consistent group of people, male or female, there's personal drama. I didn't really have any of it revolve around me, so I was fine listening to it and hearing about it from others. It didn't really impact me much. My last thought is it did cost a fair amount of money. I had an on-campus job so I pretty much broke even in that respect.

As for positives... I think first for me would be the amount of empowerment. It really helped me come out of my shell and feel competent in the social sphere. I went from being super shy and disorganized to being much more self-confident and organized. I made a lot of good friends, many of whom I'm still in contact with (though only close contact with a handful). I met a lot of really inspiring people doing lots of different things with their lives. I learned how to work with people with all different kinds of styles of doing things, how to plan, how to coordinate with multiple associations including faculty and staff, how to run a hundred-person event. I learned about PR and how to handle a crisis. I had a lot of fun at our activities and events, and I almost always had people to do something with. I was never lonely and I was never bored. I also took a position where I helped advise girls who were struggling academically, and it was pleasing to give back in that way. And there are sorority sisters all over the country... there's a huge support network and a world that I belong to if I ever need or want it.

How would more introverted people fair?

It probably depends a fair amount on the chapter. My chapter was around 35 people, so that's fairly small when you consider it's subdivided into 8 semesters' worth of pledge classes (people inducted each semester) - so basically only around 5 girls per pledge class. Even though we were all one large group and interacted together often, within those large events we still tended to break apart into littler groups of closer friends. So it was not like you had to interact with the whole group all the time. Personally I'm very ambiverted and I found the need to be "on" socially overwhelming at first, but as I got to know everyone it became much easier for me. At least in my experience, it was hardest my first semester when I had to get to know everyone. After that it was much easier to interact in smaller settings, and to just meet the younger new girls each semester, which for me felt much lower-pressure because I was already on the "inside".

I'm pretty sure there was at least a handful of introverts in my chapter. They tended to revolve around their personal interests / causes and find their "niches" where they could comfortably deal with so many people, with the organizational structure as a bit of a buffer. I think it would be the hardest on a solitary, independent introvert who likes to come and go as they please, but for an introvert who enjoys social belonging and structure, the organized format actually lends a degree of compartmentalization and predictability that can make it easier, in my opinion, to socialize.
 
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Cellmold

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[MENTION=10496]skylights[/MENTION] Thanks for sharing your experiences, it's very interesting.
 

skylights

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[MENTION=10496]skylights[/MENTION] Thanks for sharing your experiences, it's very interesting.

You're welcome! Thanks for asking! :)

I hope it gives a more realistic picture of Greek life than what is stereotypically portrayed. That sort of Animal House experience does seem to exist in certain places, but it's definitely not a ubiquitous thing. For the most part, the people at my school involved in Greek life (particularly the ones who went into leadership) tended to be the overacheiver type more than the partier type.
 

Julius_Van_Der_Beak

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It does seem to me that fraternities and sororities are not monolithic. I'm not too knowledgeable about them, because my school didn't have them, but judging someone solely based on membership in one seems a little harsh.
 

Mole

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Fraternities don't exist in NZ.

And yes we don't have Greek fraternities at the Australian National University, we do have many clubs and societies and we even founded a new society of our own that was very successful.

I most remember the large picnics in our beautiful environment as well as the extraordinary permutations and combinations of relationships within our society, as well as being touched by personal tragedy.

It was a magical time in a magical place - quite like, Wind in the Willows.
 
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The bigger plus is having three states attorney's just within my Fraternity family, and 7 or 8 regular attorneys.

The rest are General Contractors in construction around the state.

Wowww!!

I think I've already given Fraternities credit in my posts in here.

The above was one of those "joke" things.
 

DiscoBiscuit

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Wowww!!

I think I've already given Fraternities credit in my posts in here.

The above was one of those "joke" things.

I know. I wasn't responding negatively to you.

I was responding to anyone presuming that co-eds were the only benefit of Greek life.
 

Azure Flame

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I was in the military... and in the words of some officers, "The Navy is the worlds largest frat."

I left at the first opportunity I had because I'm not one to conform to group think and brag about how many people I can rape.
 
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