Homeschooling -- Recommended?

[Ricin]

If you have read the whole thread, you will know that I am no fan of homeschooling. Developing a "social deficit", however, is the least of one's worries. First, it is very easy to compensate for this through outside activities and even homeschool co-ops. Second, a huge amount of that social interaction is vastly overrated, and you are just as well without it. I attended typical public schools for K-12, and deliberately kept myself out of the social scene because it was superficial, petty, and a drain of the time and energy that I preferred to direct toward other pursuits. You don't have to have a homeschooling background to be considered the "smart, weird kid" in high school. With the benefit of many years of hindsight now, I am reassured that was the right approach.

I still think anyone who was in a social environment has a much better understanding of socializing than someone who wasn't. And it really isn't that easy to compensate for. I'm currently 28 and have spent a great deal of time trying to learn how to fit in and what it and isn't acceptable and still don't get some of the most basic things.

People I know who were socially awkward in school seem to get the concept better than me simply from being in school.

 

[Coriolis]

I still think anyone who was in a social environment has a much better understanding of socializing than someone who wasn't. And it really isn't that easy to compensate for. I'm currently 28 and have spent a great deal of time trying to learn how to fit in and what it and isn't acceptable and still don't get some of the most basic things.

Does it matter? What passes for social contact in high school is largely learning to keep up with the Joneses and constantly judge yourself against what other people are doing, liking, wanting, and approving. Then there are the cliques, the stratification, the popularity contests, the mean-spiritedness and sometimes outright bullying. You can expend time and energy trying to learn and excel in this system, or you can concentrate on your studies, participate in activities you truly enjoy, follow your own values and style, and ignore the rest. I would suspect a homeschooled student coming to high school would have a huge advantage in this respect, namely having confidence in what they are about, and not needing the approbation of one's broader peer group. If you are honest, courteous, and reasonably compassionate, why worry so much about what is and is not "acceptable"?

 

[Ricin]

Does it matter? What passes for social contact in high school is largely learning to keep up with the Joneses and constantly judge yourself against what other people are doing, liking, wanting, and approving. Then there are the cliques, the stratification, the popularity contests, the mean-spiritedness and sometimes outright bullying. You can expend time and energy trying to learn and excel in this system, or you can concentrate on your studies, participate in activities you truly enjoy, follow your own values and style, and ignore the rest. I would suspect a homeschooled student coming to high school would have a huge advantage in this respect, namely having confidence in what they are about, and not needing the approbation of one's broader peer group. If you are honest, courteous, and reasonably compassionate, why worry so much about what is and is not "acceptable"?

In high school I wore clothes I wanted, played sports I wanted to play, had a 4.000, and pretty much didn't care about keeping up with the latest fashion trends or wanting peoples approval. Though other kids who'd been in the system K-12 did the same thing.

Difference was they had a better understanding of how to keep a conversation going, what's unacceptable to say and what's fine, how to go about getting a relationship, how to interact with co-workers, how to work in groups, and other things you learn from socializing.

It's not about trying to be the cool kid or keeping up with the styles and other superficial concepts. It's learning general social skills that are useful when finding a job or while you're at work or making new friends. Finding a relationship, etc.. You don't learn these things without a social environment.

 

[Coriolis]

It's not about trying to be the cool kid or keeping up with the styles and other superficial concepts. It's learning general social skills that are useful when finding a job or while you're at work or making new friends. Finding a relationship, etc.. You don't learn these things without a social environment.

My point is that the social environment of high school, and to some extent earlier grades, teaches alot of bad social habits rather than the good ones that will help someone navigate their future world of work or even college. A homeschooler involved in group activities like clubs, teams, lessons, or church will likely learn the more positive social lessons instead.

 

[Ricin]

My point is that the social environment of high school, and to some extent earlier grades, teaches alot of bad social habits rather than the good ones that will help someone navigate their future world of work or even college. A homeschooler involved in group activities like clubs, teams, lessons, or church will likely learn the more positive social lessons instead.

Sure there are many bad habits learned, there are more good ones than bad.
Church... I'm not going to touch that subject for now. I'll just say I don't see much good from church and that as a homeschooled kid who went to church it's worse than high school when it comes to the bad habits.

But I'm talking about being home schooled K-12 to going in public K-12. Not just high school.

 

[Coriolis]

The lower grades are far too full of being told to follow rules for their own sake, superficial gestures of "caring" rather than learning truly to understand other people, and the beginnings of political correctness. Everything to develop a mindset of not questioning authority.

As for churches, it obviously depends on the church. They can vary immensely.

 

[ms.behaving]

I think it's a good thing.