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  1. #11
    Senior Member Santosha's Avatar
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    Here is your answer:

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/interview_questions

    Okay, so maybe not. But it makes ya feel better, ya? Ya? =P
    Man suffers only because he takes seriously what the gods made for fun - Watts

  2. #12
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dala View Post
    Likewise, when they ask about your qualifications, they're not asking for an honest self evaluation; they're asking you to sell yourself. They know full well that you didn't invent bacon and that you probably won't act with godlike patience and grace in the face of front line customer service, but they still want an embellished version of your capabilities. They want this because it is tacitly understood by all parties that everyone else has done this, and they intend to hire whoever just gave the most believable story.
    I hate this, I hate this, ....
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  3. #13
    Let me count the ways Betty Blue's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SuchIrony View Post
    Does that sound pathetic or what? To not be confident about your own confidence level?

    So I got turned down for yet another job. When I asked for feedback on what I could do better, one of the things mentioned was that I need to appear more confident. Well it's pretty hard to be confident when you keep getting rejected! I think my job search goals are pretty realistic. I won't apply for any positions that I don't meet the qualifications for. Some are a little bit of a stretch but I know I could handle it. I would take extra courses or study to get up to speed. So that does suggest some confidence yet I'm told I don't appear confident.

    For one thing, I come across better on paper than in person. I can write a mean resume and job application. Yet in person, I hesitate and say ummm alot. Maybe its because I'm an introvert and I naturally gravitate more towards written communication.

    I'm also honest about my abilities and modest. I won't claim to be able to do things that are beyond my skill level. I will instead admit that I don't have a whole lot of experience in that area but am willing to practice more to get up to speed and I will give it my best shot. Besides, how can anyone be totally sure they will succeed? People mistake my honesty for low confidence whereas I see it as a healthy dose of realism mixed in with enough introspection to know what my strengths and weaknesses are.

    I am willing to take on new challenges and do things that are a bit of a stretch but I also like to warn people that I'm taking on something that's new to me so they don't have unreasonable expectations. Besides I don't want to promise something I can't deliver.

    So how can I appear more confident while still being honest about myself?

    I've asked the interviewer and she said things like self-talk and to visualize a positive outcome which I already do regularly.

    Anyone else relate to this? Anyone got some good tips?
    I always found that doing some research on the company helped at interviews... that way i could tie my values in in some way and express also that you would like to work for them particulary because of x.y.z. Enthusiasm really helps too, it depends a little on the position you are applying for but it's always good to have knowledge so you are armed for interview.
    "We knew he was someone who had a tragic flaw, that's where his greatness came from"

  4. #14
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    I like these:

    Quote Originally Posted by EvidenceOfRedemption View Post
    They don't want you to be more confident, they want to feel more confident that you'll be a valuable person to hire and if you come off as too wrapped up in yourself to help that makes you less attractive as an applicant.

    The whole "confidence sells" advice is a byproduct of our consumer-market driven culture. Marketing experts know what people want so a pattern of making things seem that way to push the buttons of consumers (whether what their selling is really that or not) has emerged and many people have forgotten the origins were based on actual value and not "market yourself" hype.

    Don't try to be more confident, you are confident because you actually meet the requirements and you know it. You're just getting wrapped up in others' perception of you and it's diminishing the natural appeal you already have.
    And @dala's

    Quote Originally Posted by HelenOfTroy View Post
    I always found that doing some research on the company helped at interviews... that way i could tie my values in in some way and express also that you would like to work for them particulary because of x.y.z. Enthusiasm really helps too, it depends a little on the position you are applying for but it's always good to have knowledge so you are armed for interview.

    Correct me where needed pls. Regarding the average work place, not google, k?

    Even though HR attracts NFs,

    they woke up stressed, spilled their coffee, cleaned their cat's poo, dealt with a monster child

    fear they'll lose their job, have a Te boss (or an xNFP acting as one), been ground and chewed and spat out and then chewed again by the corporate structure so much

    that even if they still have the strength in their hearts to actually care about strangers

    they don't have the strenght to act on that care

    because if you don't display the pre-recognized (Te) behaviors

    and lie you'll kiss ass get along with everybody at the department

    they can't recommend you.

    If they do,

    and you don't kiss ass / take up abuse / gurgle your boss's balls/clit get along
    or don't fit in
    or don't stay happy with your crappy life
    or have an opinion

    and leave in 3 months
    or cause trouble
    or stick out in any other way

    The hiring managers need HARD, MEASURABLE prove it's NOT their fault.

    I'd really like to hear somebody who is in the industry.
    Last edited by Istbkleta; 05-01-2012 at 09:40 PM.

  5. #15
    darkened dreams labyrinthine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    I hate this, I hate this, ....
    I agree 100%

    I wish people were just accurate and direct. It would be a better world.

    And actually, if I'm ever the interviewer no image play would sway me in either direction, so maybe there is the occasional interview that is rationalistic instead of image and games.
    Step into my metaphysical room of mirrors.
    Fear of reality creates myopic morality
    So I guess it means there is trouble until the robins come
    (from Blue Velvet)

  6. #16
    Honor Thy Inferior Such Irony's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marmie Dearest View Post
    Develop self-efficacy in areas you actually are good in. This will build your self confidence. You set tangible goals for yourself and accomplish them, or achieve at things that are in tune with your natural strengths, you WILL be more confident in yourself without having to exaggerate or pretend or appearing to have no confidence in your abilities.

    Rejection is your core issue here, so you have to find ways you can succeed according to your strengths which may not be necessarily in the job interview world. Use your skills in some other way to complete a personal project, do volunteer work, or whatever you can think of. It will help your self-esteem tremendously and you can talk about that in interviews.

    Never put yourself down in an interview. You can be modest and humble without downplaying yourself.
    I do all this already but its not getting me anywhere.

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    Secondly, you have to feel competent enough in the interview that you have extra attention left over to lavish on your audience. Instead of wondering what they think of you, you are interviewing them to see if they and you are a good fit. That means you will be curious about the company, pay attention to small details, ask them questions and generally put them at ease. I've found in performing that I need to not just reach a level where I can play the material well, but to polish it to the point where if I lose a couple of notches of greatness during the performance, it will still be at the level that I was originally aiming from. In short that means that you need margin - extra confidence, extra practice being interviewed, practiced speech and body language to avoid hesitancy and so on, so that even if you panic, auto pilot sort of takes over.
    There's no quesiton I thoroughly prepare. I anticipate just about every possible interview question that I could be asked and practice well thought out answers to all of them. Problem is that I still panic too easily and I don't have auto pilot in place. How do you get auto pilot to take over? It doesn't work for me.

    Quote Originally Posted by fidelia View Post
    In most interviews, they will ask what you perceive as your biggest weakness. Think about how you can spin that so called weakness into a strength, rather than looking for your soft spot and telling them where it is. This conveys to them that you have put thought into what you will say, you believe in your product, and that you have something valuable to offer them, which is absolutely the truth!
    I do this too.

    Quote Originally Posted by dala View Post
    Interviews are exercises in applied bullshit. The interviewer asks why you want to work that the Burger Barn, even thought they know damn well that you just need some money. They expect you to say how you believe they have a good culture or some other nonsense, maybe throw in some language from their mission statement.

    Likewise, when they ask about your qualifications, they're not asking for an honest self evaluation; they're asking you to sell yourself. They know full well that you didn't invent bacon and that you probably won't act with godlike patience and grace in the face of front line customer service, but they still want an embellished version of your capabilities. They want this because it is tacitly understood by all parties that everyone else has done this, and they intend to hire whoever just gave the most believable story.

    Are there any days or times you're unavailable to work? Not at all, you wish there were cots in the back so you never have to leave. How do you deal with conflict? I confront it head on in a cool and rational manner, and it always ends well. Do you have experience dealing with difficult customers? I live and breathe customer service, and I believe that complaints are opportunities in disguise (note that this did not answer the question; if you dance around the issue you never have to admit that you don't know something).

    It sucks that interviews are designed this way. It puts the extremely honest at a disadvantage on par with that of the mildly retarded. You can either hold out for an employer to recognize your abilities even as you qualify and downplay them, or you accept the game for what it is.

    *awful fast food job examples used because most people have done that at least once
    LOL, so true!

    Quote Originally Posted by Coriolis View Post
    @ the OP: a big part of the problem may be how you present yourself. Have you tried practicing with someone who can offer you knowledgeable critique, or even videotaping a practice session? Get some practice questions, or use questions you have been asked in real interviews; decide on the gist of your answer, and practice wording and delivery. It sounds like you need to work on showing confidence more than actually having it, at least when it comes to ability to do the job.
    I have practiced but mostly in my head or typing up what I want to say on paper. I haven't practiced in front of someone else that much, maybe I should do more of that. The last time I videotaped myself was 5 years ago. Maybe I should try that again. I live alone so I don't have family, a spouse or a roomate to give me feedback unless I invite them over or send them a video I made of myself. What I could do, is submit a video of myself to this forum of how I would answer commonly asked interview questions and I could get your feedback?

    Quote Originally Posted by Huxley3112 View Post
    Here is your answer:

    http://theoatmeal.com/comics/interview_questions


    Okay, so maybe not. But it makes ya feel better, ya? Ya? =P
    LOL! So true!

    Quote Originally Posted by HelenOfTroy View Post
    I always found that doing some research on the company helped at interviews... that way i could tie my values in in some way and express also that you would like to work for them particulary because of x.y.z. Enthusiasm really helps too, it depends a little on the position you are applying for but it's always good to have knowledge so you are armed for interview.
    I always research the company thoroughly and use that information to my advantage. I say something like, I read your website and notice you do this and I have the skills needed for that. Still not getting job offers though.

    Quote Originally Posted by fia View Post
    I agree 100%

    I wish people were just accurate and direct. It would be a better world.

    And actually, if I'm ever the interviewer no image play would sway me in either direction, so maybe there is the occasional interview that is rationalistic instead of image and games.
    I've actually thought about going into HR just so I could be an interviewer for once. I could work towards reforming the interview process. I think there is a tendency for people to hire those like themselves. I doubt many interviewers are INTPs or even introverts so I'm at a disadvantage. If I were interviewing someone, I'd value honesty. I'd rather have someone admit they found something difficult but would try hard to remedy that. If someone was nervous, it might actually be a plus in my book because it shows the person actually cares about doing well and making a good impression. I'd rather have someone hestitate a little than just mindlessly plunge forward. I'd rather hire someone with good ideas and answers to questions than someone who is more style than substance.
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  7. #17
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    For me, I've found that preparing what I will say is not enough. I've got to get to a point where I'm not just worrying about what they think of me, but rather what I think of them. I've found that putting myself in a number of potentially terrifying situations with the same material beforehand allows me to gauge what happens when I feel nervous. This means that I am not surprised when these reactions happen and can even plan ahead for how to deal with them.

    Do you know anyone who is involved in some business field? Can you ask them to interview you and give you feedeback before the actual interview? Failing that, ask a lot of different friends and acquaintances just to ask you some questions from a list. You don't even have to get feedback from them, but it gives you a chance to answer in a variety of situation. If you think there may be a panel of people interviewing you, try to simulate that first.

  8. #18
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    Well it's pretty hard to be confident when you keep getting rejected
    This is you're first problem. The world is a tough place, and there is only one thing you really have control over, and that is your actions.

    You can't let the actions of others, especially business interviews, determine you're self worth.

    You can do all the leg work, and prepare all you want, but if you don't really believe in you, how is someone else supposed to.

    Quote Originally Posted by SuchIrony View Post
    I doubt many interviewers are INTPs or even introverts so I'm at a disadvantage. If I were interviewing someone, I'd value honesty. I'd rather have someone admit they found something difficult but would try hard to remedy that. If someone was nervous, it might actually be a plus in my book because it shows the person actually cares about doing well and making a good impression. I'd rather have someone hestitate a little than just mindlessly plunge forward. I'd rather hire someone with good ideas and answers to questions than someone who is more style than substance.
    This whole paragraph illustrates my point, your arguing that the system is unfair and should fit with your worldview better.

    That's never going to happen, and the sooner you can come to terms with that the better.

    You need to focus on your strengths figure out why you're so valuable to the working world.

    What is that little unique thing that you can bring to the table that differentiates you from everyone else?

    Once you find that thing, and get excited about yourself and about how awesome your skills are, it's much easier to convincingly sell your attributes to an interviewer.

    But if they sense that you're nervous, and you keep needlessly describing your truest weaknesses, they are going to read that as a lack of confidence in your abilities.

    You can know all the stats and have the best qualifications ever, but it you can't convey to that person across the table that you, without reservation, believe in your abilities, they wont ever be convinced.

  9. #19
    yap yap yap xenaprincess's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SuchIrony View Post
    Problem is that I still panic too easily and I don't have auto pilot in place. How do you get auto pilot to take over? It doesn't work for me.
    What's helped me in the past is writing stream of consciousness before the interview or presentation. This is something I borrowed from the book 'Learning to Draw: Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain' (less drawing 'on the brain' than using the right side of your brain to draw, ha).

    You basically write three pages of freehand text, whatever comes into your head. Write it, don't type it. It's anything and everything - the drivel, the fears, the complaints, for three pages. It's a way of washing out the stuff in your head. Afterwards, you rip it up and throw it away. The writing is a means to an end.

    Before presentations, it helped tremendously, so that I was more present and less caught up in all that stuff in my head. I'm no presentation guru but I used to get a sort of stage fright, even in typical meetings with my boss. I've gotten better with my work issues so the habit fell away, but I'm going to pick it up again.

    Try it. Maybe try it for something not so important as a job interview, at first?

    I can be rather shy but at times, I can seem confident and outgoing. I'm like you in that my writing skills are stronger than my verbal ones. But...if I feel compelled to get to know a person, I can lose that self-consciousness for a while. Focus on that person in front of you and try to make a good connection with him/her. Physical exercise also helps, and avoid things like caffeine before an interview.

  10. #20
    Certified Sausage Smoker Elfboy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SuchIrony View Post
    Does that sound pathetic or what? To not be confident about your own confidence level?

    So I got turned down for yet another job. When I asked for feedback on what I could do better, one of the things mentioned was that I need to appear more confident. Well it's pretty hard to be confident when you keep getting rejected! I think my job search goals are pretty realistic. I won't apply for any positions that I don't meet the qualifications for. Some are a little bit of a stretch but I know I could handle it. I would take extra courses or study to get up to speed. So that does suggest some confidence yet I'm told I don't appear confident.

    For one thing, I come across better on paper than in person. I can write a mean resume and job application. Yet in person, I hesitate and say ummm alot. Maybe its because I'm an introvert and I naturally gravitate more towards written communication.

    I'm also honest about my abilities and modest. I won't claim to be able to do things that are beyond my skill level. I will instead admit that I don't have a whole lot of experience in that area but am willing to practice more to get up to speed and I will give it my best shot. Besides, how can anyone be totally sure they will succeed? People mistake my honesty for low confidence whereas I see it as a healthy dose of realism mixed in with enough introspection to know what my strengths and weaknesses are.

    I am willing to take on new challenges and do things that are a bit of a stretch but I also like to warn people that I'm taking on something that's new to me so they don't have unreasonable expectations. Besides I don't want to promise something I can't deliver.

    So how can I appear more confident while still being honest about myself?

    I've asked the interviewer and she said things like self-talk and to visualize a positive outcome which I already do regularly.

    Anyone else relate to this? Anyone got some good tips?
    brag to yourself. not necessarily verbally, but tell yourself on the inside
    - I'm awesome
    - I'm so smart
    - I'm so sexy
    - I look good
    - I love myself
    etc

    take a lesson from Chalie Boy

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