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  1. #11
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Qlip View Post
    Now, I've stayed out of her drama for the most part. But yesterday I got roped in. She sent me an e-mail, basically delegating to me the task of looking something up that she's perfectly capable of looking up herself and then have me tell her cronies the answer, because 'she's busy'.

    I answered them the best I could, because the question was somewhat nonsensical. Then, I proceeded to talk about about her 'shitty question' (yes, I called it that), and then told her she should come over to talk to me next time so I could know what actual problem they were trying to solve.

    How would you handle this?
    I would probably have ignored her email.
    She's not your boss. By doing her bidding you make yourself her bitch. Why would you do that to yourself?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  2. #12
    Post Human Post Qlip's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    I would probably have ignored her email.
    She's not your boss. By doing her bidding you make yourself her bitch. Why would you do that to yourself?
    Because I want to be helpful, when it is actually needed. If the resolution pleases you, the last thing I heard from her is, "I won't ever ask you a question again." I'm not entirely pleased by that, just partially pleased.

    @ violaine Ha, don't beat yourself up. Our brains often don't work the way we wish them to.

    The review went well. I kept it on my career until she asked expectantly if I had anything else I wanted to talk about. I basically said that I probably overreacted, but was irritated by her question. And the overreaction was due to an unpleasant work history I had with her. I touched lightly on that. Later I alluded to how our group was getting cliquish. She affirmed that she noticed that. And I told her that I prefer to handle personal issues directly.

    I am very tired of a large portion of my life feeling like some sort of speed bump on my way to free time. I think that if I can engage it in a different way, I can make my work days so much more engaging. I've been thinking about this and I think my biggest fear is the same I have in other areas of my life. Its the fear that if I give an inch they will take a mile. It really is more about my lack of confidence in myself that I can keep from being swallowed up by the machine.

    Anyway, that's an entire other thread subject that I won't start. But, I think I will start on about maintaining positivity in a negative environment.

  3. #13
    Starcrossed Seafarer Aquarelle's Avatar
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    Crap, I just wrote a long response and then accidentally hit Back instead of posting it. Summary: glad the review went well, your coworker is immature.
    Masquerading as a normal person day after day is exhausting.

    My blog:
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  4. #14
    Analytical Dreamer Coriolis's Avatar
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    I have had the good fortune of having, for the most part, very capable and supportive supervisors. When problems with a specific colleague became too serious simply to tolerate, I knew I needed some kind of help, but didn't want to whine either. I eventually described some specific incidents to the boss, but instead of expecting him to "fix it", I asked for advice on how I could handle it better myself, as part of my own professional development. I did get some pointers . . . plus now the boss was aware of the situation, and I had his official sanction to proceed with the solution. (Only works if you have a decent boss, though.)
    I've been called a criminal, a terrorist, and a threat to the known universe. But everything you were told is a lie. The truth is, they've taken our freedom, our home, and our future. The time has come for all humanity to take a stand...

  5. #15
    figsfiggyfigs
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    Quote Originally Posted by Salomé View Post
    I would probably have ignored her email.
    She's not your boss. By doing her bidding you make yourself her bitch. Why would you do that to yourself?
    ^ yup.

  6. #16
    Senior Member Chaotic Harmony's Avatar
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    Glad to hear things went well. I think most of us have the unfortunate luck of dealing with a coworker like that.... Some are just more directly involved than others.

    She started off sounding a lot like my mom's boss.... She takes on all these projects, but doesn't do anything on them herself, she just hands them off to those that work under her. My mom currently has six different projects from this woman.... And of course, they are all last minute top priority things. Lucky for us that she isn't crazy rude like yours...

    Hopefully your coworker will chill out... And maybe your boss will ask her to tone it down a notch at work.

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