I found out that the University had primed its honors students so they would do well in the finals exams. I whistle blew on that, got a written apology and duly put it on all the notice boards. Honors students cheat by studying too much anyway with that additional advantage.
All sorts of horrible experiences with vomit. I can drink wine now without the reflux action kicking in... quite funny how your body/mind can prempt sickness/illness by the smell (of wine).
I'll give a funny horrible college experience. I took "History of Rock n' Roll" because I thought it would be an easy A and that professor was so tough and nit picky about the test questions that I ended up getting a hard won B. I spent hours studying for that damned class. It was all sensing type factoid questions, not theory.
Last year someone came into my history class late (they had been at the dentist or something) and said that two sisters had been murdered. I found out later that day that one of them was a girl from my school I just felt my stomach sink... people were crying everywhere
-Tries to think of a funny one- Ok, this one didn't happen to me but earlier today I was waiting outside my english classroom and one of my friends said she had really bad period pains so she lent against a radiator in what looked like a very comprising position (I hope I don't really have to describe it)... then her teacher came round the corner both of their faces were priceless!!!
Where you used to be, there is a hole in the world, which I find myself constantly walking around in the daytime, and falling into at night. I miss you like hell. ~Edna St. Vincent Millay
Great story, Ivy! A tree once fell on my car too. I was on a Boy Scout camping trip and had driven my car up to the campsite to unload some equipment. One of the younger boys was chopping down a tree so we could start a fire. If you're good, you can chop down a tree in such a way that you determine the direction in which it falls. This boy was not good. A big fat tree fell right on the roof of my 1978 Nova. We all watched it happen, powerless to do anything...that was probably the longest five seconds of my life. As it turns out, 10 of us managed to lift the tree off the car and swing it around to drop on the ground. There were a few scratches and a minor dent on the roof, but the car was totally fine. I do wonder if the windows would have blown out had they not been rolled down.
If that's not an ad for the solid construction of old American cars, I don't know what is
(sorry for the derail, Memptress!)
Everybody have fun tonight. Everybody Wang Chung tonight.
So there I was in a Geography examination, unprepared of course. The one thing I was prepared for was dealing with how I was going to have to deal with poop in my pants. I didn't want to leave while taking the test because the professor may suspect that I would cheat somehow? I finished fifteen minutes before the time was up and probably heard enough bowel movements for a year. I finally mustered up the willpower to turn in the examination and bolt for the washroom. Well, given the fact that I was unfamiliar with the toiletry facilities in the examination building, I bolted towards familiar territory: The Student Union. I made it without a moment to spare and I couldn't deliver. I could not just take a poop.
Shrugging, I then proceeded to walk home to the dormitories. As I was walking home, about 70m away, I had to go. I sprinted home and reached the identification keylock to my building. Fumbling massively and desperate for hope, I managed to swipe my card and open the door. I ran up to the fourth floor and nearly felt as if I were about to lose it. I fumbled once again trying to grab my keys and miraculously entered. The home stretch. I did it. My INTP suite mate is in the bathroom taking his sweet ass time showering / shaving. I knock and say, "I have to go to the bathroom". At that moment, I lost. I took my left hand around my bum to contain it the best I could. Minutes seemed like hours and finally am greeted with a half conscious INTP informing me that the bathroom is free. I'm glad he didn't smell anything. I went to the toilet to dispose of my entrails and furiously threw my clothes into the shower. I hand washed them as well as myself. I dried off and sat in my chair comprehending what just occurred. "I'm an adult (18 at the time) and just shit my pants".
Last edited by Noel; 04-18-2008 at 04:45 PM.
I may be bested in battle, but I shall never be defeated.
As far as gross bodily experiences: In my last year of college, at the end of the fall term, I caught a really bad flu, I laid up the night before on the couch watching my fever rise to 104 F at one point around 4 AM (highest fever since I was a kid!). There was no sleeping with sore throat and coughing. I believed them when they used to say "if you aren't in the hospital, there won't be a make up test" , so next morning I went in to take my final. What a chump! I bet if I had called the professor she would have let me make it up, but back then I hated to ask people for things. I just did.
I took a box of tissues in with me and sat in the back of the room, constantly hacking up copious amounts of phlegm and shivering, everyone else came in and took a horrified look at me and sat in the front. By the end of the test, I had emptied the tissue box and desperate for more. It was so embarassing to be so grossly sick in front of everyone, one hand furiously filling the blue book and one hand with tissues.
Sweet holy God. SWEET. HOLY. GOD! Ok, before I even get into the new responses in this thread (which look pretty entertaining), let me say this: my professor wrote back.
I know all about the 2-alarm business. I have a regular clock-radio
AND my digital wristwatch set to get me up. The clock-radio was
attached to an outlet with a circuit breaker that pops for no good
reason, cutting power to it, so I had to re-attach it to another
No worries, mate!
I go out of my way not to advertise it, or else I get inundated with
requests, but I will occasionally give makeups. How about after class
Oh my sweet holy god. Can you EVEN BELIEVE IT??? Oh my god! I'm freaking getting another chance! I'm so freaking happy! Oh wow. CELEBRATION!
They're running just like you
For you, and I, wooo
So people, people, need some good ol' love
That's awesome, Mempy. I didn't mention it, but my prof also let me write my test immediately after class (since I thought class was the following period), which was super nice of him. It's always nice when a prof gives you a break.