Intellectual Snobbery: I think I'm getting over it.

[DiscoBiscuit]

Oh totally, I have had arguments and lost friends because I wasn't able to just have fun with it and I needed to win and made it all about winning. I have toned down quite a bit in terms of how I come across when I am competing with other people, but I still feel the same way internally. I just tend to be more careful about it, like strategically it makes more sense for me to not win every single time I do something so as not to hurt peoples feelings that I compete against, this in turn makes them want to compete more and I can pick and choose when I turn it on, this means sometimes I am just having fun and others I am really trying to improve myself. But if I don't go 100% all the time then I have more practice anyway because people aren't afraid to compete with me. Does that make sense? lol

Makes total sense.

I still did it when I played varsity tennis in high school. Luckily I had internalized it though. When I would get pissed, I would punch the strings of my racket between points.

I still have scars on my knuckles.

 

[brainheart]

I had to quit playing tennis when I was little because I got too competitive and it stopped being fun for me.

How competitive and intense I can be fucks up potential human interaction more often than I would like.

Um me too and I'm a female and an INFP. I don't think it correlates to gender or personality type.

And when I piss sitting down I don't have to tuck anything under, so there!

 

[Kingfisher]

i am somewhat of a recovered anti-intellectual.
i do have a healthy respect (and admiration) for intellectualism now.

how often do you hang out with people who are substantially "less intelligent" than you?
i find myself making quite a lot of friends/spending time with people who are very intellectual and smart. it doesn't have to be that much of a bone of contention.
but that is a great way to break intellectual snobbery. spend time with dumb people.

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

It's more of a distaste for explaining things to people.

Which it seems like that is all I'm doing these days.

Also, its not as fun when people can't keep up conversation like I can.

I love witty banter in RL.

I love discussing serious shit RL and its hard to find people who can offer something to me. As far as talking politics goes, the only person from whom I still really gain anything is my Criminal Law prof. who was a poli. sci. at Harvard and got his JD from Duke.

Its frustrating to not be understood by people. I was ridiculed for being different when I was young, and my intelligence played into this. A lot of my frustration towards less intelligent people, is really just jealousy for how much easier it is for them to fit in.

 

[brainheart]

Yeah, I hear all of what you're saying, shrubbery biscuit. I've had the same issues. You need to have a balance. You have your witty banter people and you have your people who are smarter in other ways. I am not going to say less intelligent because they are intelligent in ways you may not recognize as intelligence. And if you hung out with them and didn't make judgments about them you would be quick to learn that this is the case. That's what I've found, anyway. You just talk about their things or do their things.

 

[Kingfisher]

well Disco, you can be intellectual and not be a snob, i know that you know that. it seems like you are talking more about wanting to find people with similar interests and backgrounds that you can be on a level footing with, more than you are talking about actual snobbery. you don't come across as disdainful.

you know, when i am with intelligent people the shoe is on the other foot. it is frustrating for me to not be understood, too.

You need to have a balance. You have your witty banter people and you have your people who are smarter in other ways. I am not going to say less intelligent because they are intelligent in ways you may not recognize as intelligence. And if you hung out with them and didn't make judgments about them you would be quick to learn that this is the case. That's what I've found, anyway.

yeah, you are absolutely right.
and you are going to have a little bit different dynamic with every person you meet.

 

[DiscoBiscuit]

well Disco, you can be intellectual and not be a snob, i know that you know that. it seems like you are talking more about wanting to find people with similar interests and backgrounds that you can be on a level footing with, more than you are talking about actual snobbery. you don't come across as disdainful.

you know, when i am with intelligent people the shoe is on the other foot. it is frustrating for me to not be understood, too.

Yea. These things usually cut both ways.

This thread is just about me getting over it, and I'm happy about that.

Yeah, I hear all of what you're saying, shrubbery biscuit. I've had the same issues. You need to have a balance. You have your witty banter people and you have your people who are smarter in other ways. I am not going to say less intelligent because they are intelligent in ways you may not recognize as intelligence. And if you hung out with them and didn't make judgments about them you would be quick to learn that this is the case. That's what I've found, anyway. You just talk about their things or do their things.

Agree totally.

 

[brainheart]

This thread is just about me getting over it, and I'm happy about that.

It's a good thing.