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  1. #21
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    You're not upper class are you?
    Nope...
    What is the something else you've decided to try?
    Well, it was going to be going back to school to get some kind of certification at the community college first. There was also going to be learning social skills somehow and networking before starting the search. I've heard you need connections in order to get (at least a first) job. The real problem, I guess, is that I'm not involved in anything consistent that I can structure my life around, like school, a club, a job, etc. I'm just stuck in this... mire of unstructured disconnection (due to my failure to make real friends rather than just Internet ones), and it's sapping my will to focus my energy consistently in useful ways rather than just sleep, eat, overanalyze my situation, whine, and surf the Internet all day. Plus, it's not really apparent what will improve my chances and what won't, so I really have no idea what the heck I'm doing.
    If you are serious about finding a job, post or PM an anonymized resume + fields of interest and you might get more concrete assistance.
    Sigh. But I look terrible on a resume. As soon as I'm asked for that, I know I'm not getting the job. All I have to put on there is my high school diploma, and I've got no experience and no references. It's quite literally almost an empty page with several headings, because they ask for things I don't have yet. I've got several computer skills, and I've helped out my Dad out in offices before enough to know about copiers and filing, but I have no formal experience because I've never been employed... and AFAIK, they don't consider the experience unless it's verified in some way.

    I'm mostly interested in office work, or something related to typical computer skills (adminstration, I guess?). But the thing is, considering how bad I look on paper, I think I've got to take whatever I can get.

    I've already talked and asked about this in so many places that I feel ridiculous asking for more advice already. Then again, maybe that's just because I'm used to the work I need to do being work I can figure out on own, like schoolwork. Not stuff I need to engage other people to figure out. So I've kind of been conditioned to feel guilty and lazy about asking for help over and over when I don't know how to do something on my own. What's funny is that the other kids never felt that way, and didn't do quite as well because they didn't take it totally on themselves to do stuff... but they were better at working interdependently. I never learned how to trust, rely on, reach out to, or work with others to accomplish tasks (or even just to socialize), because I was usually smart enough to figure most parts of them out on my own, with maybe a question or two here and there.

    The problem here is that I'm dealing with a process that's inherently interdependent from an independent perspective, due to my lack of connections and awareness of the way things actually work vs. the way they should theoretically work. I really only know how to build up theoretical knowledge and create a presentation, not build up practical knowledge and act.

  2. #22
    Senior Member avolkiteshvara's Avatar
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    Skills aren't enough. You also have to learn to sell yourself.

  3. #23
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by avolkiteshvara View Post
    Skills aren't enough. You also have to learn to sell yourself.
    I know that. But I don't know how to learn that.

    That was already discussed in more detail, but thanks anyway.

  4. #24
    The Architect Alwar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    Can you suggest an alternative?
    (that actually works)
    Participatory Economics (Parecon) devised by Robin Hahnel and Michael Albert is withstanding the most criticism and has some examples in practice. Peer to Peer (P2P) is another alternative proposal conceived by Michel Bauwens but I haven't seen any examples of it in practice. Recently Albert and Bauwens have been debating Parecon vs. P2P with the latter looking a bit gimmicky. There are probably many other proposals out there.

  5. #25
    Senior Member avolkiteshvara's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Athenian200 View Post
    I know that. But I don't know how to learn that.
    Then use some of that F, find people more experienced than yourself to mentor from. Do toastmasters.

    There is more chaos than decades past. How you choose to handle it is you deal.

  6. #26
    meh Salomé's Avatar
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    You must have some contacts, even through the Internet, family etc? It's true that it's not what you know, it's who you know. Something like 75% of jobs are never even advertised. That said I suck at networking but manage to find work without too much difficulty. You need to start by changing your attitude, you are being self-defeating and that won't get you anywhere. Be creative with your resume. Don't assume people won't be interested. Most skills are transferable to the workplace. There are books which deal with how to sell yourself with a resume even if you don't have any work experience. Register with employment agencies - sometimes they offer resume review/writing as a service. Employers realize that everyone has to start somewhere. But you seem to be unfocused and not really know what you want, which isn't a good place to start from. Don't sell yourself short either. You're an intelligent, thoughtful person with a lot going for you, are you certain that you are suited to clerical work?
    Quote Originally Posted by Ivy View Post
    Gosh, the world looks so small from up here on my high horse of menstruation.

  7. #27
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    Find a way to be self-employed. There's still lots of money to be made on the internet, which is probably the easiest place for introverts to thrive financially.

  8. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by ajblaise View Post
    Find a way to be self-employed. There's still lots of money to be made on the internet, which is probably the easiest place for introverts to thrive financially.
    I've considered Internet work, but I really know nothing about it. What kind of opportunities are there that don't require IT training?

  9. #29
    Minister of Propagandhi ajblaise's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Uberfuhrer View Post
    I've considered Internet work, but I really know nothing about it. What kind of opportunities are there that don't require IT training?
    Well these days it's possible to development a website with barely any HTML and coding knowledge. I use content management systems, like Drupal and Joomla.

    The Digital Point forums are a good place to go to learn about all things web development

  10. #30
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bluemonday View Post
    You must have some contacts, even through the Internet, family etc? It's true that it's not what you know, it's who you know. Something like 75% of jobs are never even advertised. That said I suck at networking but manage to find work without too much difficulty. You need to start by changing your attitude, you are being self-defeating and that won't get you anywhere. Be creative with your resume. Don't assume people won't be interested. Most skills are transferable to the workplace. There are books which deal with how to sell yourself with a resume even if you don't have any work experience. Register with employment agencies - sometimes they offer resume review/writing as a service. Employers realize that everyone has to start somewhere. But you seem to be unfocused and not really know what you want, which isn't a good place to start from. Don't sell yourself short either. You're an intelligent, thoughtful person with a lot going for you, are you certain that you are suited to clerical work?
    This is my problem. I had no idea that I needed to make or hold on to contacts back when that information could have been more useful. I met several people throughout high school that might have made good contacts if I had kept up with them... but I didn't keep any of their contact information after the year was over, because I... err, kind of grew up under the impression that friendships were supposed to be temporary, like classes or project groups, and only lasted as long as they had a utility to both parties.

    The thing is, I'm just looking for a job, so I'm looking for something I know I can do to make money. I... don't want to plan around finding the ideal career. My situation is complicated enough that there are factors other than job satisfaction to consider. Specifically, the main reason I'm looking for a job is to get into a position to see a psychologist about a certain problem, and gather resources to get out of my current situation. So for me, the job is a means to an end... not an end in itself. Though I'm willing to put a lot into it anyway.

    This is probably why I don't like this... it's like I'm expected to have had the goal of a career in mind since I was 12, and be way beyond the point of getting my first job. I'm being thrust into a situation at 21 that I'm expected to have dealt with at 16, on top of the lack of availability of the same resources I would have had to get started at 16-18. They scared me out of trying a lot of things by making them sound like a challenge, but apparently that was actually supposed to motivate me. So I didn't react to anything the way I should have. It's funny, though... a lot of things they tell you to do as if they were as simple as breathing are actually quite challenging, and a lot of things they make sound challenging actually would have been easy.

    The worst part is... it's like because I have certain advanced abilities in terms of intelligence and reading emotion, people assume I'm already far more advanced in other ways, like keeping contacts and awareness of procedures and options for reaching out to others for help, than I actually am. People will always assume I know what I'm doing in situations where I don't, because I have a set of skills they view as advanced beyond the skill set I don't possess.

    It's like (and this is probably a bad analogy)... imagine if someone knew how to do trigonometry and physics, with an intuitive sense of what all the functions could do and why, but couldn't do any basic arithmetic without a calculator. No one would believe this, because trigonometry is viewed as the more advanced skill. But it could potentially happen. I feel that something similar to this has occurred in my social/emotional development, and no one on here believes it's possible, so they don't see it.

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