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They cannot separate the criticism of their idea from their personal identity because it accesses their feelings directly. Thinkers tend to be able to separate attacks upon themselves into those that are descriptive of their character, and those that are not. They accomplish this in virtue of their impersonal approach to life, as they treat the matters they think about as mere objects to make discoveries in regards to. INFPs are unable to do this because they are unable to separate their feelings from their objective perceptions. Due to this inability, and their unconscious use of the Thinking faculty, they often wish to see the world conform to the way they feel it should be. Intellectually, they hear a dim voice from the background of their psyche pointing out the logical essence of their situation, yet it is often overwhelmed by the despotic tone of their superior Introverted Feeling faculty.
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As an INFP with a 55% Feeling, I recognize that I can idealize someone/something because of my feelings over thinking, however, since I believe my thinking facilities are fairly high (45%), I recognize that I can be wrong about things, too; I adjust my internal feeling-meter accordingly. This, however, has been something I work hard on. When I was younger, what you had stated above definitely rings true to me.
(FYI - I'm not stating this because I feel like you are attacking the very emotional INFP in me...
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