Quote:
Originally Posted by soleil
I wasn't trying to categorize all ESFP's or SP's or anybody. I know everyone is an individual with different perspectives/experiences. I just wanted to put that info in there, thought it'll help.  |
Yeah, I don't know that it helps to pin traits like inconsiderateness on any one type. It sounds to me like your friend is self-centered and maybe doesn't realize it. Could you simply tell her in a kind way how her actions make you feel? I admit I can be pretty self-centered too. Although I recognize that in myself, I still sometimes forget about others' needs and just consider my own. When others tell me how my actions affect them, though, that changes my behavior. I really don't want to have a negative impact on others.
By the way, I have a very close friend who's an INFP who has no clue as to how inconsiderate she can be at times. We'll invite her over for dinner and she'll call a long while after she was expected to show up to say that she was feeling too stressed out by her job and wanted to stay home. So we've gone to all the trouble to make this great dinner for someone who not only doesn't feel "up to" showing up but who couldn't be bothered to call earlier to cancel. She has done this repeatedly, so that whenever we decide have her over, we usually invite other people so that if she doesn't show up, we can divide the leftover food between us all. Sometimes she calls late to cancel and other times she doesn't even bother calling, or she'll call the next day when we're at work and leave a note on our answering machine. We love this woman, and consider that this is just something we have to put up with because she's our friend. If we got mad at her for it, she'd only beat herself up for it, and she's already going to therapy for lots of other issues -- so we choose not to make it an issue.
As for SP-NF friendships, it's not only possible, it can be delightful. My best friend is my ENFJ husband.
Sarah
ISFP