[helen]

I consider someone a friend when:

We care about eachother's well being.

There is a high level of trust and comfortableness in the relationship.

We can and do talk about personal struggles and concerns.

We actively seek each other's company and conversation and our friendship exists independently of circumstances throwing us together.

I have often pondered what pre-existing conditions are necessary for these dynamics to come into play between me and another individual. Sometimes it seems so random, you go through life, meeting people, trying to be somewhat pleasant, and some folks just stick around while others don't. I'm not sure what makes the difference. *shrugs*

Another observation: friendship is not like family affection or romance or general benevolence. It has little survival value, but it is one of the things that makes survival most worthwhile.