Quote:
Originally Posted by Hmm
^ I wonder if you tell your wife these thoughts you have?
|
Not in a summary like that. We have talked about it - she knows getting married was difficult, and she knows my need for freedom. As I said, at the practical level, she respects this and gives me way more freedom than average. I pay that back by ensuring I keep myself in check - give and take.
I put a lot of effort into the relationship because I know that our particular combination (ISTP-INTJ) is prone to... spiralling out of control. So, I force a lot more communication from myself (and from her), and she does it to me.
(I didn't include any of the "how we dealt with it" in my post since it didn't really relate to the OP. I know it isn't a popular view, but ISTPs on average will need to make a lot more relationship effort than other types. This isn't something I tend to say because it gives the wrong impression - that ISTPs are bad mates, but that isn't the case. We just have to watch our own internal sensitivity and our external... lack of sensitivity.)