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Originally Posted by Xander
I refused to cry when I lost my mother because basically if she was still alive then she'd still be in pain and all because her son cannot let her go. I refuted that. I refused to crumble and instead I'm as happy as I can be about it. I knew her and that's what I hold dear. To try to pull her back or have her waiting around for me somewhere smells of selfishness to my nose.
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Actually, I'd cry because it hurts, not because I'd be saying I'd "want them back."
It's okay to express emotion, without it being any sort of demand or intellectual statement. It just "is."
I'd cry because I loved them, and now they're gone.
And then I'd get over it and move on with my life as best as I could.
btw, I'm sorry about your mom, but I'm glad you can see it as a positive thing.
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All I usually see is someone who wants more as pretty much everyone does. The question is, how much is enough?
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Again, I don't necessarily see that. I think fear of death is just part of being human and fearing pain, loss, disability, lack of control, whatever. Why deny it? Why pretend we're invulnerable? It's a lie.
I do agree that the most spiritual/strong people are those who learn to accept their death -- the fact that everything that has a beginning has an end, that there's a time for it all and then a gracefulness in allowing things to move on -- and thus use that bookend to frame their lives now even more brilliantly.
Death defines life. (see my tag: "Only in silence the word; only in dark the light; only in dying life; bright the hawk's flight on the empty sky.")
You run from death? You'll be running from life too.