Argh. I can relate very well to what you're saying, since my mother is an ESFJ too. In my case she's more likely to play the victim role, as I'm the 'coldhearted and unemotional' one.
I could tell you how to 'counter-attack' her, but that would only cause more trouble (and for sure you know that an ESFJ mom angry is not very nice).
I just recommend you to not show that she hurts you. Or actually laugh at her 'jokes', and simply show that she has no greater power over you. She's just trying to re-assure that she's the one in control, so rebelling is hard.
On a second thought... Have you ever thought that she might have some issues? That is not a healthy attitude. Maybe she's trying to deal with something, and since you're under her 'control', she projects that on you.
You could also simply wait until you leave... but she will always be your mother, and you can't just run away.
Sorry, I'm not very helpful, but anyway, good luck on that.
|