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Does your ENTJ know about personality typing?
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Yes, and he was professionally typed at U of M when he did his MBA there. Still, he thinks it's an outdated piece of pop psycology and claims that the business world stopped using it 10-15 years ago. But, he usually humors me and listens when I prattle on about it. But he's really more behavioral in his approach though he recognizes that intelligence is at least partially inherited. So in his mind it's all about desire and hard work. If I ever say "it's not my nature to...." then his response would be "fine, but that means you really don't want it bad enough."
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What is your response to this? Do you think you were spoilt?
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Hardly spoiled. Yeah, I did what I wanted a lot of the time, but that was because my parents basically neglected me, gave me no guidance or support. Strangely enough, his parents were exactly like mine - absentee father, and a critical, depressed mother. Funny how we turned out so different.
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Can you think of times when you have cooperated even when you didn't like it?
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Several times per week.
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At first glance, I recognized this as unhealthy ENTJ style projection, where in fact it's they who are stubborn control freaks with relentless agendas, but they make out it's you. One of my ENTJ's went through a phase like that... took a lot of working through but he's great now.
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How did your ENTJ friend get over this tendency? Did your friend also have a tendency to blame others when things went wrong?
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Freedom has nothing to do with control
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I didn't think so, but he has a way of connecting the two.
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This is the sort of thing that a RL friend is far more helpful for--we can't tell if you're biased to kindly guide you to "see the light" just as we can't tell how much your husband's xxTJness is setting the tone for what "should be standard" and if he's being domineering in an unhealthy way.
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True. I was really just wondering whether the need for freedom was essentially the same as being controlling (but mainly turned inward), the same with stubborness.