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Old 08-27-2008, 12:09 AM   #19 (permalink)
substitute
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Join Date: May 2007
Type: ENTP
Location: Europe
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Hmm View Post
Maybe it makes them happy to please you.
I've thought of that. But it's important for me that people know my friendship is not dependent on those things though, that if they sense obligation then it comes from themselves and not from anything I'm expecting or requiring.

I guess I just can't understand a mindset that would actually think they can 'command' affection, which is all I think a choice to spend free time with someone should be based on, genuine affection. Like just because they manage to, one way or another, get a person to spend their time with them, that this equals that person actually loving them. It doesn't. It could just mean they dread and want to avoid the grief they'd get if they didn't, but would rather not. The idea of a person seeing me that way is mortifying. That's why it's so important to me not to interfere with a person's freewill.
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