I don't know, Ivy. I am in the same position.
C is as certain of faith in the Christian God as I am unsure right now, and all of our children attend church and church events. The eldest is inwardly skeptical (as I expected), although he doesn't make waves outwardly because he's not the sort to cause trouble. B believes whatever you tell him, enthusiastically. And A quietly believes and asked Jesus to come into her heart a few months back and is very set on doing what she think he'd have her do.
What do I do with all that? I do not want to "ruin" a positive commitment; as far as behavior and idealism goes, I think wanting to emulate Jesus is a good thing, and if someone can find it in themselves to be convinced of his claims, then I don't want to ruin them either (since life is much harder in the ambiguities, and I am not even sure I'm right).
But 8-9 months ago, I interrupted morning devotions with the idea that the Adam & Eve story was possibly an analogy/metaphor... and my own children laughed because they had no clue what I was saying: How can something be "true" and "not true" all at once? It actually became a running joke for a bit, and I was even inwardly annoyed because my own children were sort of poking fun at what I thought was the most reasonable objections. And I had to decide that it was okay, and that was where they were at right now.
That made me think more about giving them too much ambiguity to start with. If they were mature and in adulthood, then I could do it, but their brains and minds are still developing. It's almost as if they need to have a foundation set FIRST, and then I can start shaking things up... but until the foundation is set, any ambiguity I add to the mix just seems to cause confusion for them. I want them to be skeptical in the good ways, not cynical or always afraid and unsure of what they know.
I hate having to play all of this by ear. I think I will just gently introduce possibilities to them as they get older and also really let them initiate any ventures into "grayness." I expect the eldest to be the most open and interested in the gray spots. It is just hard, because C so firmly believes in Christianity while I am completely unsure and have no way to prove or disprove anything about God. We both understand where each other is at and try to be fair with each other about how those views are represented to the children, but we are still somewhat at odds right now...
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