[SillySapienne]

Originally Posted by Dana

I know the point: power, admiration, praise, attention, envy....

But that's such a hollow and fleeting satisfaction, isn't it?

Can I get a witness?!?!?



Amen to that.

Originally Posted by Edahn

I can say with confidence that my true nature is to be accepting and empathic. I'm sure there are times when I naturally don't feel that, but the meanness is, like Ivy said, a reaction to something else. It's possible that I'm intolerant of that meanness in front of certain people (whereas here on a forum, it's easier to express because there's --

Those with truly accepting and empathic natures do not feel the need to please by putting on a show, those with truly accepting and empathic natures accept themselves, fully and wholly as imperfect "perfect" human beings, and they accept others as imperfect "perfect" human beings as well.

I think that being accepting and empathic, is *part* of your true nature, a *part* that given enough time, self-awareness, acceptance can/will eventually grow.

Being intolerant is *not* being accepting, and it is *not* being empathic. When we are being accepting and empathic, we are being *understanding* of another person, of why they are who they are, and why they do what they do.

Hm. Maybe it's that I don't want to be rejected once people know me. On a internet forum it's easier because there's no less intimacy. If people reject me on a site that I have 4 posts at, I couldn't give a shit because they're not really rejecting me; they don't know me. But in RL, or even on this site where I've put in a lot of time, it's a little bit more serious and personal.

This is quite common. Being dumped after a month, hurts, but being dumped after a year, really leaves a lasting sting. People should not take things sooooo personally, (yeah, easier said than done, I know), but really. When a relationship doesn't work out between two people all that means is that these two particular people don't work well together, that's it, nothing more, no one is at "fault", the two puzzle pieces just *don't* naturally fit together.

Still though, I don't see why I wouldn't let myself think certain thoughts about those people. Why's it bad?

It sounds like you are restricting yourself, and restricting your true nature.

The lack of authenticity is accurate, CC, but it goes deeper than that, I think.

First you must find your authentic self, the more authentic you become, the less pretense you will be willing or able to show.

Yeah, I would probably say I was with school and grades. I was always liked by my teachers too.

I was like this too.

How many siblings do you have? Did your parents give you enough positive attention/affection/affirmation?