[Xander]

Having worked with ESTJs the only thing that seems to keep them happy seems to be demonstrating competency.

Sure as an INTP working with them I have a natural defence against the attempts at being pithy, the undermining comments and the general overdone punch in the arm. For some reason me combining intuition with a naturally aloof manner is interpreted as being a smartass and the only defence I've found against this is by being matter of fact and trying to make sure that all the t's are crossed and all the i's dotted (if you get my drift).

On a side note my father is an ENTJ and I think we'd still be at logger heads if he hadn't taken up the MBTI. He was the one who got me interested in it and it was he who tested me. At 18, after many years of not understanding each other, he tested me and declared "Aha. THAT's why you do that!!". Since that point it's gotten better and better.

Now you may find that your father will think the MBTI is poppycock as if he is playing to type it'll be contrary to his thinking that there is more than one correct approach but if you can get him to look at it and apply himself then perhaps he'll be more understanding of your approach.