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Shadow496 · 03-31-2008, 09:03 PM

I dunno, really...I still hold on to a lot of my regrets and am finding it very hard to let go of them. I'm hoping once a few positive things in my life happen I can start to see a bright side and that these 'stumbles' will have not been in vein, but at this point I'm not there.

There are probably two major things that I regret/wish I had chosen differently: my school for undergrad, my first job once I finally got an offer.

I'm not sure that choosing the other state university (I was accepted to both Washington State and University of Washington) would have really made a large difference in my life, but I still think about it a lot. I think Seattle would have been an awesome city to live in as a university student. Not so much as a 20-something-SWF just starting out. I have a regret during college of not choosing a good back-up major if my first major fell through. I ended up doing a History degree which I enjoyed but it ended up being essentially useless.

After 6 months of job searching after getting my degree I finally got two job offers...within about a day of each other. One was as very basic office-grunt kind of job that paid enough to get by and had some benefits, nothing special but it was a start and appeared to have direction to move after a while within the company. Come to find out later on that wasn't really true and that's how I ended up in London studying for a year because I needed to get away. The other job offer? Teaching English in Japan on a year contract with the Nova group. It would have been an exciting adventure and I would have learned some valuable skills like Japanese while earning some money. It also wasn't expected to be long-term as there was obviously the contract was only year-to-year. Come to find out just recently the company went bankrupt in October 2007, about 5 months after my contract would have been up. So, in a way I dodged a bullet by not going as well.

I feel like in both these cases I chose 'the easy way' and the way that pleased others (namely my family) and not myself. I'm planning to apply to law school this fall and I'm hoping this will be my opportunity to choose what I feel is right rather than pleasing others, even if it means hurting their feelings for a while. If the choice I make is the one they'd make for me, so much the better. We'll see in spring next year what happens when I get my responses. In the end I'm the one living my life and have to live with myself and these regrets. They've gotten to make their choices and I'd wish they'd let me make mine. I don't think they really understand because I'm able to put on a good show of being happy for them even when I'm not (generally, they knew I wasn't happy at my job).

Anyway, enough of that rant. Sorry if I didn't end up answering your question very well.

03-31-2008, 09:03 PM	#2 (permalink)
Shadow496 Junior Member Join Date: Jan 2008 Type: ISTJ Location: Seattle, WA Posts: 6	I dunno, really...I still hold on to a lot of my regrets and am finding it very hard to let go of them. I'm hoping once a few positive things in my life happen I can start to see a bright side and that these 'stumbles' will have not been in vein, but at this point I'm not there. There are probably two major things that I regret/wish I had chosen differently: my school for undergrad, my first job once I finally got an offer. I'm not sure that choosing the other state university (I was accepted to both Washington State and University of Washington) would have really made a large difference in my life, but I still think about it a lot. I think Seattle would have been an awesome city to live in as a university student. Not so much as a 20-something-SWF just starting out. I have a regret during college of not choosing a good back-up major if my first major fell through. I ended up doing a History degree which I enjoyed but it ended up being essentially useless. After 6 months of job searching after getting my degree I finally got two job offers...within about a day of each other. One was as very basic office-grunt kind of job that paid enough to get by and had some benefits, nothing special but it was a start and appeared to have direction to move after a while within the company. Come to find out later on that wasn't really true and that's how I ended up in London studying for a year because I needed to get away. The other job offer? Teaching English in Japan on a year contract with the Nova group. It would have been an exciting adventure and I would have learned some valuable skills like Japanese while earning some money. It also wasn't expected to be long-term as there was obviously the contract was only year-to-year. Come to find out just recently the company went bankrupt in October 2007, about 5 months after my contract would have been up. So, in a way I dodged a bullet by not going as well. I feel like in both these cases I chose 'the easy way' and the way that pleased others (namely my family) and not myself. I'm planning to apply to law school this fall and I'm hoping this will be my opportunity to choose what I feel is right rather than pleasing others, even if it means hurting their feelings for a while. If the choice I make is the one they'd make for me, so much the better. We'll see in spring next year what happens when I get my responses. In the end I'm the one living my life and have to live with myself and these regrets. They've gotten to make their choices and I'd wish they'd let me make mine. I don't think they really understand because I'm able to put on a good show of being happy for them even when I'm not (generally, they knew I wasn't happy at my job). Anyway, enough of that rant. Sorry if I didn't end up answering your question very well.